Today is my sister’s birthday. My one and only sister. It seems like the perfect day to post a little something about her – and I think I do best with words on the page (or screen as it is) so here is a little tribute…
Yes, she is my older sister. 5 years older. (Sorry I had to say it! Ha) She was first to come along. My brother came next – and then me.
Growing up she and I shared a room for a long time. (She will have to tell me where we started to share – was it in Rockville? I would think so but I don’t remember the room.) We got a large enough room when we moved to Cleveland Heights that we each had ‘a side’…. she got HER side; I got MINE. Remember she is five years older than me, and I know she was not happy about having her little sister in the same room. With that age gap she was always in a different school, and had different friends, and was into the Beatles (big time!) and really ‘put up’ with my being around…. and gritting and grinding my teeth at night. I know that drove her crazy!?!
It wasn’t til she was in high school that she finally got her own room. (I got one too.) I know she must have been thrilled – a room all her own! I remember she got to pick out how she wanted it decorated – in blue and white. Blue is still her favorite color. She got the little back porch off her bedroom too. I thought that was cool.
In high school she played clarinet and was in her school’s jazz and marching band. I went to her concerts – and got to go to the football games. She and I had taken piano lessons when we were younger and she took some organ lessons for a bit too. Music was part of our growing up. I thank my parents for that every day!
Then off to college she went. We had recently moved again and she had a tiny bed room in the new house – but she wasn’t there much, only for a few vacations from school. She left college for love – and moved back to Cleveland to be near her eventual hubby. No lie – it was a mixed move. She was happy to be near him, but it was a tough family situation. Even as her little sister I knew about some drama. But, she took a job at a bank and made her life there.
I was a senior in high school when my sis got married. I was in the wedding. (My bridesmaid’s dress? Blue of course.) A March wedding in Ohio – with snow on the ground – and if I remember right it was a cold mix of rain and snow that fell that day. Thinking back it was probably one of the first weddings I had ever been to – and certainly the first one I was in. I was living in another state and off to college a few months later. Yes – I was in my own world. When you are young those five years is a big gap.
Sister married and eventually had an adorable baby girl. (I became an aunt!!) Blonde with curls! Cute, cute, cute – and smart. My sister & hubby raised her mostly in one house, in one school district. She was a working mom – and a very dedicated mom. They lived in a great place to raise a kid!
But… My sister went through some struggles for sure. Life hasn’t always been rosy and when she was only 52 she lost her husband to congestive heart disease. That’s a pretty young age to become a widow. During this time (I guess it was before) our parents moved close by and they were there as support for her… which turned out to be a “mutual” connection as our mom was also struggling with Parkinson’s. Why do bad things happen to good people? It’s hard to watch. It effects everyone. It was a tough time..
When my mother passed – and as the years have passed along now, my sister has become my dad’s friend, support, care giver, medical laison, driver, pet sitter, and more. This little sister (me) watches from afar – and knows the amount of time and heart that goes into it. I took a different path a long, long time ago and left the state, and left much ‘work’ in her hands. There is good and bad about it for sure. I’ve lost the connection and I’ve missed out on all the daily events. All the little things. I don’t experience many family events and I also don’t hear about them, but I don’t experience the down times either.
So…. My sister, on this birthday, should know that her selfless giving has not gone unnoticed. I celebrate her for being ‘there’ and for being the eldest with all the duties that go along with it. Her dad, her brother & family, and the good friends she has have filled her life…. and her music brings her joy! (Again, thanks Mom & Dad.) This ‘baby’ sister and family, who are far away, are truly thankful for EVERYTHING that she does!
I once mentioned to her not too many years ago that you never lose your ‘birth order’ relationship in family, and some childhood parts never seem to go away. I’m a grown (middle aged) woman now but I still feel like that dopey little sister of the family. I often feel I say things wrong… or am misinterpreted. I think it is one of the reasons writing and blogging has become important to me. I can say it here. So, I say it now…
HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my sister – and thank you for being You! I love you!
Marla’s Musings 