This past week I have experienced the joy of celebrating my granddaughter’s 2nd birthday and the sadness and concern for my 96 year old father who went through hip surgery.
As we know a baby coming into the world isn’t always easy. My daughter can tell you that! She had a long labor, and various interventions were used to bring her first child into the world. It took days, not hours. It was very painful. The worst pain she had ever experienced. Granddaughter Madelynn finally arrived and she needed some tests run right away to make sure the birthing process didn’t do any damage. That meant she spent a few days in the ICU. It was a scary time for the new parents who had to wait for test results, and to watch her in her tiny hospital bed.
Thankfully all tests came back good, and Madelynn came home – and now I can look back on the Timehop pictures from 2 years ago and smile, knowing she is a normal little toddler today. She is a blessing to the family and this Mimi enjoys her immensely.
Hours after the 2nd birthday party celebration I got a text about my father falling, and going to the hospital with a broken hip. We all know that people in their 90’s have weakened bones, and a loss of balance, so it was not a surprise that he fell. He had been using a walker to get around but he let go to grab a sweater in his closet and down he went. It was that quick.
Family rallied, and I flew up to be there too. On Monday dad made it through partial hip replacement surgery. On Tuesday he had a pretty rough day, with post-surgery pain and the start of physical therapy, yet at times he had a clear enough mind to think about what happened, and how much work was ahead to gain the ability to walk again. As I said he is 96 years old. There were times on Monday he called out to the Lord to take him. There were times he swore – and that’s not something he does in his every day life. Times he looked at me – saying ‘why’ with his eyes.
My sister-in-law kindly said ‘God is not ready for you yet’ and he and I both wondered out loud if God makes this decision. If He does, then WHY doesn’t he take my dad now to escape the hard work ahead, to only have another issue eventually take him. My dad has lost much of his quality of life. For years he has resided in an assisted living facility. He has needed help for basic needs – for food and to get dressed and showered. His hearing is poor. His short term memory is weak. He has lost his appetite and barely eats.
My dad was a Lutheran pastor for his whole career and he served churches in several states. He was the one there when church members had their babies and shared in their joy at baptisms, and he officiated at many of their funerals too. At retirement he became my mother’s full time care provider as Parkinson’s took her away slowly. He has now lived 20 years without her.
It’s really hard to understand why so much of life has been tough on him, and also on my older sister who became his chief caregiver when he could no longer take care of himself.
But, just like how coming into the world can be difficult, it seems that going from it can be too. Does God hear my dad asking to take him? Does dad’s and my praying make any difference? I have always been told that God HEARS all prayer yet He may not answer the way we want Him to answer them. Of all people, dad devoted much of his life to teaching about God, and in spreading the Good News of Jesus. But I also know that we Christians live in this world and we experience all of the hardships of it. Biblically, the Christ followers were persecuted. They suffered greatly.
Is suffering a test? I hope not.
The joy of a baby coming into the world is certainly celebrated. Milestones of childhood are too. When my dad leaves this world as a very old man, one who has lived through so very much, I will celebrate that too. His suffering will end.
Marla’s Musings 