It’s Sunday morning – church morning – right?

Well for the last year or so I have been doing various things on Sunday mornings. I’m not attending the church here that I did for some 15 years or so. My choice. As a devoted handbell ringer I have become ‘ecumenical’ the past couple of years by ringing with two different groups at two other local churches. I have found that I was away from MY church twice a month anyway ringing elsewhere, and part of me liked the variety in experiencing other services. All are Protestant so there are lots of similarities for sure. But I have come to a point in my life where I am really questioning where I want to be – and why. I still am as I sit here this Sunday morning.

I just finished a book called ’52 Churches” by Peter DeHaan. Peter and his wife took a full year to go visit a different church in their area each Sunday. Not because they were looking for the ‘perfect’ church, but instead to do a bit of an experiment and to see what works and what doesn’t within each church building. They visited large and small, big stone buildings, and storefronts, Baptist, Mennonite, Methodist, Roman Catholic, some non-denominational, some conservative, some open, some great at greeting visitors, and some not good at it all. Mr. DeHaan kept notes each week and compiled it to make this book. Obviously it’s very subjective. It is through his eyes (and his wife’s who attended with him). All the churches were local in a rural/suburban part of Michigan.

Some of my ‘take aways’ from the book were this:

How a newcomer is welcomed is really important! Visitors to a church get an instant vibe when they walk through the doors. Are they greeted? Are they asked their names? Do members offer to help them? Are they invited to sit with members, to coffee time?

For Mr. DeHaan worship music was not a deal breaker. I admit that I am different. And, if anything he likes the more modern setup with a ‘praise band’ on stage. One thing I found interesting in his research is just how many churches he visited had a band made up of guitars, a keyboard, a drum set – and vocalists, all standing on a stage up front. That is still ‘unusual’ for me. Yes, I have experienced worship with a praise band from time to time but I find that it doesn’t feel like church to me. I love going to a church where I can still experience an organ (because it’s the only place to still hear it), and to hear choir anthems, and hymns sung. Of course I like handbells too! The non-denominational churches (or the ones that sometimes hide their affiliation – yes, some do) are big into ‘performers’ on stage. Lots of repetition with the music. And, I noticed from Mr. DeHaan , and my experiences, that the band tends to play for a good 20 minutes or so to start the service. (Too long for me – especially when it is repetitious.) The music is followed by a few announcements, and a sermon or message. Sometimes scripture is read, sometimes not. Sometimes prayer is said, sometimes not. The band plays again & the vocalists sing on stage again – and it’s over.

I was raised in what Mr. DeHaan calls the ‘high church’ because it has a liturgy (and an order of worship including scripture readings, a creed, the Lord’s Prayer) and follows a church year calendar (Lent, Easter, Epiphany, Pentecost, etc.) Growing up I thought all churches were like mine. There was a reverence in walking into the sanctuary. There was a cross as a focal point.

Okay, here’s one thing I never experienced though: The “Call to the altar” which seems to happen in many churches, especially Baptist ones. Every Sunday! What?

I get the trend to go more casual now a days and to use new technology. I’m all for that. We can certainly spend time together worshiping God that way. It is bringing people in and ‘something is certainly better than nothing.’ Right? Different options are good for people to choose from. Here’s my concern: Most young families are not even walking into Protestant churches to give them a try. As Mr. DeHaan wrote these churches are slowly dying. They are for old people, and that’s okay. But one day those people will be gone and the church buildings will have to close.

I experienced that in MY church where I was for many years. I joined when we moved here, and the congregation had a spirit about it, and there was joy, and yes, music! I watched as the pews became less filled. I watched as Sunday school classes for children went away because we had no children, and then no VBS. I watched as we could not find a good music leader, and then how money concerns tightened the belt. It’s sad to sit there in the pews and see it happening. I missed the days of before. I missed the people I knew, because worship experiences are about the people coming together.

I also sat there and wondered how our politics have hurt mainline Protestant churches, because it has. The church I have always attended is part of the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America. Yes, evangelical is in it’s name. BUT, it’s NOT that Evangelical. Politics and conservative churches have become attached to the name and therefore has put a new meaning to the word. I am not that. In fact, I am opposite in my beliefs when it comes to a loving, and accepting God, one that offers hope for everyone equally. I am a proud liberal thinker. I am a humble Christian. I saw January 6th and everything that led up to it as a nightmare for our country, and it really hurt how people connected God to the violence and insurrection on that day. I think God must have been hurting big time over it too.

Our country was founded on a separation of church and state for a good reason. Our country was founded on the right for everyone to worship as they want as long as they don’t physically hurt another person. But we are going through a period of some strong willed people in political power wanting to choose how religion beliefs can or cannot be allowed here – to the point of pulling at our democracy.

I would sit in a pew in my church each Sunday and listen to scripture and the message about God’s love, and hear what God wants from us (love your neighbor as yourself), and His gift of forgiveness, with repentance, and salvation. But it seemed to stay there. Maybe I had too much time to think. Maybe aging gives me the time. Or, maybe I have become too much of a deep thinker. Not smart mind you – for that I am not.

So, what to do? My personal faith is strong. My life has always revolved around church. But as I said above, I am questioning what to do.

Next month handbells will start up again and I will be participating in worship at least twice a month. The other two Sundays I may do my own little church visiting experiment. I don’t know. I miss devoting my time to worship and I want to continue to hear the Word, to sing the hymns, and to take communion (that’s a whole ‘ other discussion on how churches vary).

I sense my choice of worship is a dying option. Will my daughters and their kids get the opportunity to experience the way their Mimi grew up in church? Perhaps not. And that’s okay. Maybe a little sad. But as the DeHann book said there are 52 ways – and really thousands more ways – to seek God, to worship together, to continue to learn about how we are God’s people on earth.

For a few months now I have been thinking about devoting a special musing to my sister-in-law Linda. She died this past Spring only after 8 weeks of finding out that she had pancreatic cancer in March. She had not been feeling well for awhile, and she had gone to the doctor for nagging back pain, but it wasn’t until a mini-stroke happened to her that more thorough testing was done and the cancer was found. Pancreatic cancer goes undiagnosed often because symptoms don’t show up until it’s already really bad. So by the time Linda’s cancer was diagnosed it was stage 4, which means the cancer was not just in the pancreas but also in the liver and it was spreading into other areas.

The mini-stroke was a blessing because with it Linda lost some short term memory, and although she had been told about the cancer, she did not remember it in the early weeks after her diagnosis. She went downhill pretty quickly. And, as I said, she passed from the cancer – in her bed, with family members around her. She was only 73 years old.

Linda was my hubby’s oldest sister. She was the first born of three. Her mother was a teenager when she had Linda and although I didn’t know any of the family back then, I have heard many, many stories of the tough times during their childhoods. Yes, every family has dysfunction in it and some ups and downs, but they certainly had more than their fair share. One can’t help but wonder how a child feels those effects all their life, and if someone like Linda was unfortunately ‘given a raw deal’ in life from a young age. Yes, people can persevere and rise above bad situations but many still have lingering pain, and they hold in their sadness, and jealousy, and the ‘what ifs’.

When I first met Linda I was engaged to her brother. Back then, and all of her life, she lit up a room when she walked into it! Attractive. Blonde. She had that ‘something’ – a mix of southern style, kindness, concern about others, and humor. She was always fun to be around! Just like her mother (Nannie) and her Aunt Judy, Linda had a way of turning time spent together with them into an ‘event’. There was always a lot of laughing!!

Linda never got the chance to go to college because she became a mother as a teenager, but she found a ‘career’ for awhile as a jewelry buyer for departments stores, and also in representing certain jewelry lines. When I got to know her, once I became her sister-in-law, I admired her business skills, her hard work, and the traveling she often did for her job, and I knew she and her husband at the time made ends meet, and they seemed like they had a good life.

I won’t go into details about the career and personal disappointments that happened to Linda from that point on, but she never seemed able to get it back together, to feel secure, to get comfortable in her life, to make enough money to live on her own. She sometimes reached for a shiny ring that turned out to be wrong. I felt bad for her and I often saw her in flux during her middle years of life. She lashed out occasionally because of it, and she often lived in denial, and she used her humor to cover up the pain sometimes. She often needed family help and that was hard for her – and she had to swallow her pride.

I don’t just want to write a sad story about Linda. That would not be fair. Linda had many highs too – for sure. She raised her two sons mostly as a single mother, and she had close girlfriends, and she loved to shag, the Carolina dance. She became the ‘matriarch’ of the family once her mother passed. She spent many years helping her sister in more ways than I can list. Linda loved her doggies and they brought her much joy! Men were not good to her, but oh, the little dogs were faithful and loving! She became a regular church goer, and found a calling in helping, and then leading the Jason’s House program through the church. She helped line up beach week visits for sick children and their families.

Linda always worked. She worked at, and sometimes ran. gift shops in a few of the big hotels at the beach. It wasn’t easy. Long and unusual hours. Physically tiring. And not a way to get rich by any means! She struggled with not wanting to be a burden to her family, and at the same time her family was everything to her. She was the most proud of her sons, her grandchildren, and her nieces. She was always very appreciate to the support from all of them. Her siblings too helped out. Even when she could not afford it she made sure to have little gifts for everyone. She never hid her love for them all.

Sometimes I wonder if Linda left this world when she did so that she could be released from her constant concern about how to live into old age without resources. Like I said – she did not want to be a burden. She told me this at various times. It really worried her. Her lowest moments were about those feelings. I sure can’t figure out why some people get cancer, or why illness hits one person harder than another. But I do think Linda’s legacy is that she gave it her all with the wonderful attributes I mentioned above: her kindness, expressing sincere concern for others, and all the laughs she got and gave.

I will continue to miss Linda and her big personality. She was always a wonderful sister-in-law to me, perhaps because I was married to her only brother, but I think it was more. We certainly went through much together: holidays, weddings, births, illnesses, and funerals. She and I had a few moments of ’emotion’ and disagreements over the years. Family does. She even lived with us for a few months, and she and I would sit on the porch and discuss all kinds of things.

Her life did not always go as she had hoped, and yet she always made the best of it. I like to imagine her now, in heaven – and back together with her mother, her Aunt Judy, and her Granny. Linda came from a group of surviving women. Southern women. They had tough lives – and were stronger than they even knew. I bet there is lot of story-telling now, and a lot of laughing with them now – and some dancing too.

Today the federal grand jury is convening and the people sitting on this jury will hear evidence on whether or not Donald Trump could be responsible for the horrible events on January 6th. If the jury thinks there is enough concern and evidence they can decide he should be charged and go on trial.

Justice moves slowly in America.

But today could be a big day for our democratic system. In more ways then one.

First, nobody is above the law. That means a past president can be charged and handled the same way as any other citizen. He can be indicted soon – and I believe he should. The evidence is overwhelming.

Trump has used many delays, and he has tried all he could to make himself look good, to blame others, and to get his supporters to side only with him. But evidence and truth will win out in the end. I feel confident about it.

Most important to me is that I want his illegal actions, the use of his office to try and escape justice, the ego of the man, the lies upon lies he told, to finally come to roost. That’s what our democratic system is all about. He will have his day in court and hopefully politics will stay out of it. I’m not naive enough to know that Trump supporters and MAGA people will continue to feel he is being targeted and that he should not be charged. The rhetoric will continue. With that, the lies, the conspiracy theories, etc. will keep going. So much noise. So many taken down the wrong path.

But today is a day of reckoning – for Americans everywhere.

People all around Trump – his lawyers, his admirers, his finance guys, some of his administration – have already had their days in court and were found guilty of various charges from extortion to insurrection. Corruption.

Today is Trump’s day. Not his only one of course. He has already been impeached twice, and found guilty of sexual assault. And, other charges against him are pending. No other president has been charged with all he has been charged with. This is unprecedented. This is sad. It is beyond me to understand how anyone can consider him a viable candidate for another term as president. If anything, instead he will be putting in time at some high class prison – in time. I’m patient.

But – Today is big. A grand jury of non-political citizens will make a decision today.

I’m watching.

I’m waiting.

Please may justice be served.

** I started this post two days ago. Finally finishing it up.

It’s Sunday morning and I am sitting here watching the British Open in Liverpool, as the players fight it out in the cool temps and pouring rain. What a mess for the golfers! It makes me think of hot summer days and global warming. Watching the golf in England you would never know it’s the hottest recorded summer in the United States. The temps rising is concerning (and dangerous for the elderly and poor) but I personally will take a couple of digits hotter versus a cold winter.

Yesterday I spent the morning outside doing lots of garden pruning, and cutting back shrubs. I sweated a lot. But, it felt good. Yes, you can call me weird. Ha

Here are some thoughts bouncing around in my head…

Summer always goes by too quickly. Always.

But I have had some wonderful experiences during it so far: First, the CMA Festival in Nashville with my daughters, and then heading up to NJ for a day at the Barefoot country festival in Wildwood, NJ with my bestie. The following week my daughter and family came to visit, and my bestie was down here in South Carolina so we got to spend some more time together. Finally, last week I enjoyed time both in Charlotte and at Lakeside, Ohio with all kinds of family. Some of them I don’t see very often.

I am looking forward to a quiet week ahead – and getting some books read. I ordered 4 for ‘summer reading’ and I’m starting “The Extraordinary Life of Same Hell” by Robert Dugoni now. I saw many good reviews about it on a Facebook book lovers site I follow, and on Goodreads. I will let you know. Join Goodreads if you want to stay up on what your friends are reading. I find many suggestions there and I appreciate it.

Flying: I went a long time not flying anywhere and then as life has it, I have flown 4 round trips in the last few months. In general they all went fine. One flight was delayed (a Spirit flight) because the flight attendants crew was required to have a certain amount of time for rest between their last flight at night and then the first one the next morning. My flight was supposed to leave at 7:00am – but was delayed an hour and a half. In general I prefer driving places because I have the control on my start time, the travel time, and plenty of space for what I want to take along.

I wrote a little something on Facebook about the new Jason Aldean song and video that has created controversy. Let me say here that I have always loved Jason’s music, and I have seen him live in concert quite a few times. He always puts on a good show.. Many may remember that he was the artist on stage in Las Vegas when the crazy man started firing an AR-15 and used other guns from high in a hotel that looked down on the venue. It was a horrible mass shooting, killing many and injuring hundreds. Jason and his wife, and their band, all were very frightened – of course. Afterwards they came out with a statement expressing sorrow, but never mentioned the gun crisis we have in America. He said he did not want to ‘be political.’ But his wife Brittney shortly after that created dividing talk by posting on Instagram some very conservative comments. And then the two went to a party at Maralago and posted a picture of them smiling away with Donald Trump. Aldean has not backed down on his beliefs – and he supports his wife. Brittney and her sister-in-law even started a conservative t-shirt company. So, now comes the song. Yes, some lyrics are worrisome, about small town people taking care of their own, etc. I have not watched the video. I guess I don ‘t want to give it my ‘hit’. But I have heard enough about it that shows some violence and he sings/stands in front of a small town courthouse, and he sings of ‘good ole boys’ taking care of business.

I wonder about all the people around Jason Aldean who let this song and video happen. What about the producer? The studio musicians? What about the record company – and Jason’s agent? His publicity people? There were lots of people who heard the song before it was released. There were many people involved in the making of the video. Nobody had a concern? Nobody spoke up??

As a country music fan, I have seen recently other ‘political issues’ facing artists and fans. The Bud Light ban. Kid Rock (and he isn’t even really country) putting out videos about it. Shooting the cans. John Rich of Big & Rich taking Bud out of his Nashville restaurant. The country music community is a perfect look at America as a whole. The community is made up of people of all ages, lots are from rural areas but some are urban, many are blue collar but certainly not all, and a portion support gun freedoms and other conservative beliefs. BUT NOT ALL. I hope people realize that there are lots of country music artists and performers who speak of unity, and equality, and kindness. Listen to their lyrics. One of the reasons I love country music is some of the really lovely lyrics.

Pets: I have always lived with pets. As a kid our family always had a Boston Terrier. They had these names: Pal, Ace, Deuce, another Ace. Once I got married we had Ralph, and Ally, then Lucky, and Peanut Butter, next came Miss Honeybee, and we still have Miss Daisy. A few kitties too: Gizzie and her babies born in our bushes – we kept Moonlight from her litter. Then Moonlight found us. Also, Kitty Girl, Sabrina, and now Hadley. I love pets. Hubby does too. As we get to this point in our lives though we are contemplating being ‘dog free’ after Daisy.

Can we stop hearing about Hunter? I mean really. Everybody (especially the right,) please just move on. I did read this morning tho that President Biden is not accepting that he is the grandfather to a young Hunter ‘love child’. That is sad. Families are difficult. ALL families are difficult. Biden has certainly had his share of pain and perhaps disappointment with members of his family. But, Joe, come on – be a role model to the little girl. Love her. It’s not her fault she was born.

As I said earlier, summer goes by too quickly – but, that means football season is a coming!! I always look forward to it. This year is no different. Hope springs eternal this time of year. Go Gamecocks!

Wondering… who plays Wordle and Words with Friends? I used to be a crossword puzzle person when we all got real newspapers delivered. Once we stopped getting a newspaper each morning, I went to other word games. I play both Wordle and Words with Friends. If you want to be my words friend, please feel free to invite me. I’ve got to keep the brain working!!

And – I have got to be keeping the body working: I have missed my weekly dancing while I was away on vacation and this Wednesday my instructor is away. Two weeks without dancing makes me sad.

This fall I plan to volunteer at a center called “Teach My People” in my town. “Teach my People” is an after school program for needy youth, and those who volunteer provide them snacks, help with homework, and play games, etc. during the hours until parents can come and get them. What do you do to give back? I believe putting in some time, and helping out a little bit, keeps a person grounded. Volunteering provides insight on how others live. There are so many, many ways to give back, to help out, to do something positive for others. I hope you consider it. You won’t regret it – and you will learn so much!!

Until then, enjoy summer!!

Do you feel like we are experiencing Groundhog Day? Turn on the TV. We have been here before. We are waking each morning to again hear the news that Donald Trump is the front runner for the Republican Party. If you have not been paying attention, perhaps you better. Consider this a wake up call! (Maybe this is what is meant by being ‘woke’!) There is a big possibility Trump may win the Republican primary and if so, our two party presidential candidates will be Trump and Biden – again.

I don’t know about you, but for me it makes me pretty darn sick to my stomach. In fact it’s almost quite unimaginable that we are back here, or still here. It is hard to believe that there is a group of political bigwigs and ordinary citizens who somehow still consider Trump as the best choice to run our country.

I don’t feel like I should have to remind anyone of who Trump is. But let me quickly list here a few of the attributes and issues against him. These are facts. We know he is a habitual liar. He lied over and over during his campaign and when he sat in the Oval Office. People who keep track of these things say he lied way more than any other president. He has been impeached TWICE, and is now indicted in several major federal and state cases. He is accused of trying to stop the free and fair election for president when Biden won. He promoted the January 6th activity at the US Capitol. These cases are on-going. Oh and he took top secret documents away from the White House on purpose and showed them off to friends. He lied about that too. He has been found guilty of molesting a woman (rape) in a civil case. And, he has had many other women come forward about his horrible sexual behavior. He has bankrupted many companies throughout his business career, has lied to banks to get loans, and he has mistreated employees of the various companies his name is boldly plastered on.

Certainly these reasons (and there is more) should be enough to say to any American that he is NOT presidential material. In fact he is opposite in what we want for a person to represent us here and around the world.

Listen, I’m not a Biden lover either. I think he is too old and feeble to run again, and then to make it through another 4 years. I think the job requires someone who can physically handle the crazy schedule, the traveling, and who can think and speak clearly. Biden has always admitted he has a lifelong stuttering problem, and that’s okay. But I see him now and notice he has slowed down, and it’s only going to get worse. Thankfully he has good people around him, and as with Reagan back in the day, he has a wife who supports him and props him up when needed.

So we have quite the dilemma. Will we end up having nobody on the ticket we actually WANT to vote for? What will the average citizen do then? Will they even want to vote on Election Day? And, really, out of the thousands and thousands of public servants in America, we can’t find a few others who might have the criteria needed to become the president?

As a Democrat I appreciate the direction we are going with Biden as president. I believe we are doing better economically. We have a man at the top who will not do anything rash, and that is comforting to me. He gets along with our allies, and he has the right people in place to work on his behalf. I believe a Democrat in office will work towards blending success in the financial world with a moral world and we need that as a country to live in peace. I believe in the Democratic way of thinking. We are community and our leadership has to make decisions for all to benefit equally. I believe in going forward, not backwards, and I think the Democrats, although flawed and with their own power hungry politicians, have a vision of hope and equality for all.

But – Please, oh please…. we need younger smart people willing to come forward and to get into this mess of politics. I like Pete Buttigeig and volunteered for his campaign last time around. Pete is very intelligent, a military man, who has held local office and now is a part of the Biden cabinet as Secretary of Transportation. He is a devoted family man. He has respect for others, and he understands what it is like to be labeled and treated differently.

There are others out there. Cory Booker. The new governor of Maryland, Wes Moore. On the Republican side, please, oh please, there has to be a sensible fiscally conservative person somewhere in the party. One that won’t send the party and country off the deep end! There has to be someone who can stand up against Trump and act like an adult.

We are just starting the long campaign season – lord help us ( and the length of it is a whole other issue to be addressed) and we can’t know for sure how everything will play out. But!! But, I can guarantee that there will be too much game playing, and the candidates will attack it each endlessly, the ads (we have already received some in the mail) will be mean spirited and filled with false information. There will be heated television debates, and then the over-the-top conventions that will look like the circus comes to town!. The amount of money raised and spent on all of it will be absolutely ridiculous!

But, if after it all, we end up with Trump vs. Biden again I know my heart will hurt, and my belief in my fellow citizens will again disappoint me greatly. The first time Trump ran (and won) I mourned for our country, and I began to question the people I see every day in my life, those who I see at the food store, at the park, and even at church. Did they actually vote for him? Why? Now, knowing SO MUCH MORE and still to continue to support Trump one must be in complete denial, or “sick with the kool-aid” to the point of mind control.

So…

If you, as I, don’t want another Groundhog Day (4 years) which means we certainly don’t want to see Trump and Biden as the two choices again, then NOW is when we have to act. ‘ We the people’ have a voice. ‘We the people’ can let our legislators know that we want different leadership. Start with contacting your local party members, and send stern but respectful emails to your legislators. Use your vote too. Don’t re-elect people who sit back and accept the status quo. Let your voice be known on social media. Don’t be afraid. And, don’t become apathetic to our democratic system. If you do nothing, then you have to accept the results…

Biden or Trump.

Did you have a nice 4th of July celebration? With the holiday falling on Tuesday this year I know that some people took off the weekend before it, and then Monday too. Some are vacationing all week and will head home today or tomorrow. I live in a big vacation area and every year these weeks are so busy with full hotels, restaurants, and beaches. Traffic can be a nightmare. Locals know how important all the tourists are for the economy here but they also can’t wait for them to leave. Ha

Over your vacation break did you take time to think about the significance of Independence Day? I hope so. It’s easy to get caught up in the bar-b-ques, the beach, in spending time with family and friends, and then capping it off watching some beautiful and loud fireworks.

But, I want to tell you, I have been thinking about this: I listened to a syndicated morning radio show, the Bobby Bones Show, the other day – it is one that I love. I listen to the show most mornings and therefore I have gotten to know the ‘studio’ crew. They are fun! They make me laugh, and I love a lot of the banter between them all. They compete in on-air games, have quizzes, etc. The other day the host, Bobby, had a quiz for them about Independence Day – and I was surprised at how little they knew. These are grown adults – and they missed a lot of the questions about the founding of our nation.

The questions were about what country we wanted to get our freedom from, and why. Questions were also about the Declaration of Independence, and who signed it, and what was listed in the amendments. It made me sad how little they knew.

They are not alone in not knowing.

I realize that not everyone is a history buff, and some people don’t find learning about the past very interesting. I, myself, am not good at memorizing specific dates. (Numbers are not my strong suit.) I think I had a ‘general’ education – years ago (many years ago!!), one that was required in public schools at the time. I took a required class called “US History.” And, since then, I have learned more from reading on my own as an adult.

It has me thinking about how we as Americans are not very good at remembering how our country got started, why it did, and how it became a place of hope and opportunity for many – but yet, for others it was a place of forced slavery. We don’t realize that our country almost split in two, and that we warred against each other. We killed fellow countrymen. We have had many growing pains throughout the years since 1776. And it continues today.

Compared to other nations of the world the United States of America is still a young country. All of our forefathers (and mothers) came from Europe, or Asia, or Africa. We are a nation of immigrants, just a few generations old. Our ancestors came for a new start, for safety, for personal rights, for fair representation, and much more. Those who crossed by land and sea could not have possibly imagined all the changes and inventions, and all of the progress that has happened here since they arrived. Oh – and how we have spread throughout the land, and how some settled in urban areas – and others stayed rural and farmed and ranched. Bringing ethnic and homeland traditions. And, the transportation and communication devices that have changed us!

My point in all this? When our birthday celebration hits each 4th of July we need to think back, and to know our history – and to honor it. We need to consider those who had the vision and saw it through. The men who came together and worked out a plan, made the Declaration to be free, and created a new nation! Since then it continues to be a country working on a perfect union, but never getting there. We get better because we have varied opinions, and we express them and debate, and we make decisions through free elections. Occasionally some people try to take too much control, and some spew speeches that are counter-productive. Personal power gets in the way. We seem to be going through a challenging time of it right now. But, looking back, and knowing history, tells us it has happened before – and our country has stayed together so far. That is why we are an example of a strong democracy for the whole world to see and want.. We are the American dream!!

When the bickering happens and things get ugly, and when the politicians turn to meanness, and when a small group can get too loud a megaphone: We must remember the past!! Know our history!! It has happened before. America is better because of it – even though it can be so annoying! Ha It’s important to look at the big picture and you can only do it by knowing the past. Read! Watch documentaries and movies! Be educated about who we were and why we are who we are now. Make our ancestors proud.

Happy Independence Day, or happy birthday America Day – for we are a wonderful place on earth, set up to govern on our own, to be a democratic system, and to be ‘by the people and for the people’. That is why we celebrate!

As it just so happened, I read a book recently called “Master Slave Husband Wife: An Epic Journey from Slavery to Freedom” by Ilyon Woo, and I am now reading “The Warmth of other Suns: The Epic Story of America’s Great Migration” by Isabel Wilkerson. Consider this musing a ‘book report’ and more. I hope to acknowledge that my past education did not always teach the truth about the incredible breath of America’s racial struggles and the horrors black people went through for decades and decades.

Maybe as a young white girl I did not ‘relate’ to this history, so maybe I didn’t pay attention in my US History Class. My fault. Maybe there was too much information to squish into a 45 minute a day, five days a week, one semester class. It was just way too much for any teacher to get into in the given time allowed. And, really, maybe what happened all the way through to the civil rights movement of the 1960’s did not seem like history at all. Because: I mean, I started school in the 60’s in a northern suburban area. Most of my schooling took place in Ohio and not once did I consider how inner city slums came to be, how housing and education choices were so different, and how the migration of blacks out of the south happened, first escaping enslavement and incredibly inhumane treatment, and then once freed and looking for opportunities, they traveled north and west. The “African American” came in to the south, and once able, through a few generations, they have moved and reached most areas in the United States.

Both of these books have enlightened me: I certainly knew of the KKK, and I knew of Jim Crow laws, and I knew black people were held back in so many ways. I knew of horrible lynching and separate bathrooms. But, wow – these two books both tell of the very painful paths and why we are where we are now with racial divides still. Every American should learn this history.

Remember the slogan “Reading is fundamental”? It was a slogan to encourage young people to learn to read, and to LIKE to read. Reading can be fun (that’s what they told kids) , but more importantly it gives endless perspectives, and offers ways to open the mind, to see what other people go through. Reading widens perspectives and opens hearts.

My ancestors came from Germany. They left Germany before Hitler’s rise, and they came to America for a better way of life. They made a decision and came. Of course they struggled here, having to start over – to find a place to settle and to build it up from nothing. They crossed Pennsylvania and settled in central Ohio. They became farmers. My great grandfather opened a little store. It’s a nice story.

But!!! It’s a very different story for African Americans. And, it’s important to know. Difficult reading? Absolutely! But, both of these books I named above follow the lives of real people (these stories are NOT fiction) and the chances they took, the love they felt for each other, the commitment to find a better life, the span of time it took.

It’s relevant today. History shows us, and gives us the opportunity to connect to the past. (Like I said earlier… some of it is not that long ago!! Segregation from Jim Crow laws were in place until the mid 60’s. I was up north. I was in elementary school! And, as a white little girl I just did not know. ) Thankfully I was in a family where my parents did not ever speak of any group as being less, or different. I did not hear false superior language – or prejudice talk. Thank you Mom and Dad.

But, we are dealing with people and politicians now who want to ‘protect white people’ and ban truthful books – to cushion the history for our children. They want to hide the pain that southern plantation owners caused, because some were their ancestors. I live in the south now, and I love seeing the big plantation homes still here, but I also know the WHOLE story about that time period. I know about the abuse, the deplorable mental and physical anguish caused by the white men. The demeaning of other humans. We all need to know. The above books are both excellent reads to learn about it.

Read! Learn – and know better. When you know better, you respond better. And – You vote for those who will not hide the true American story.

Well, May just flew by! Didn’t it?

I can’t believe how quickly the passage of time can go sometimes. Although, when I look back on this month we had some pretty important milestone events, some sad and happy times, and some transititioning.

Within the month we mourned the loss of Stan’s sister Linda, who went downhill quickly as her body succumbed to pancreatic cancer. We celebrated her life with family and friends together. Linda was the oldest sibling, and the first of ‘our generation’ to leave us. That’s a bit daunting. She had a tough life in many ways but she combatted it with so much love for her family, and in finding a way through it all with humor.

At the same time, the same weekend of saying goodbye to Linda, I also said hello to a group of lady-friends whom I have known since college days. They came down to the beach for a weekend gathering. Some of these ladies actually know each other from all the way back to elementary school, and they have kept a connection for 40 some years. It’s pretty impressive! I met this lovely group when I got to know my bestie Sue in college, and she and I became apartment mates in our ‘early 20’s years.’ Through Sue the girls included me on lots of get-togethers. I have felt lucky to follow along with them on their life journeys, all a little different but good.

Another transition, a happy one, was seeing my grandsons (the twins) graduate from preschool. Back in my day we didn’t even have preschool, let alone make a big deal of ‘moving up’ – but it’s kind of nice to celebrate the progressions and growth along the way. It was a sweet graduation with the children singing a few songs in front of the parents, siblings, and grandparents in attendance. Each one got a certificate of completion, rolled up like a diploma. Of course this experience was all brand new for them. It was the first time (of many to come) of standing up in front of people as a group performing, etc. I look forward to many more of these days – of school concerts and sports events, more special events and graduations. The boys start kindergarten at the end of July because they live in a county with a year round school program, which has the vacation weeks spread out. I will have to learn when they will have some breaks.

May also always brings hubby & my wedding anniversary. This one: 39 years! Again, time goes by so quickly, doesn’t it?? ! But, thankfully, I still have a pretty good memory and I can recount, and re-live, many of our experiences together through the years. We knew of each other before dating, but once we started dating we got engaged and married quickly. In fact, we got engaged at the beginning of November ’83 and married in May ’84. Putting a wedding together these days seems to take a whole lot longer. In the Fall of that year hubby took a new job that took us across the country to northern California. Out to rodeo country. Hot, dry valley heat. Brown hills (they were not ‘golden’.) Both our daughters were born out there. West Coast girls. We enjoyed living out there but we were also very happy to head back east (which felt more like home) and we first lived in the Atlanta area. Job changes kept us moving – up to Frederick, Maryland – and then to Sparta, New Jersey. We lived there, in northern NJ, for 12 years, enough years for our daughters to stay in one town and one school system the whole way through. That was a blessing for them. More of a challenge for me. Oh the cold and snow!! Oh the jughandles that confused me when I drove! I don’t now why but I felt on ‘survival mode’ there a lot. I didn’t feel comfortable, but when 9/11 happened so close to us I was ready to haul my ‘you know what’ out of there! South Carolina has been home since then and it’s hard to believe we have been here 18 years. I think we are finally ‘put’ and don’t plan on anymore moves. I once counted and we have lived in 10 homes over the 39 years. 6 states.

May finished with Memorial Day weekend which was a washout here in South Carolina. Rain, rain, rain. Cool temperatures. It was not normal, but then again, aren’t we learning that nothing is normal anymore? I felt bad for so many who came on vacations here, who rented ocean condos, who wanted to enjoy the beautiful beaches. It wasn’t happening. And, I felt bad for the locals who cater to them. Hopefully restaurants and the bars were not affected. May is a month with two different biker weeks here – and one week was very nice. This past one was not.

So – on to June!

It will probably fly by too. Summer months do.

We have the CMA Festival in Nashville in just one week! It’s the 50th year and I am hoping for some surprises. But regardless, here I come!! It’s also the birth month for our daughters.

One last thing: this weekend is “Wear Orange” to end gun violence. All around the country there will be events and gatherings and this is an opportunity for YOU to let your voice be heard. Wear orange. Attend a peaceful demonstration. Just google it and find one near you. Here in Myrtle Beach there are three events. One also in Awedaw. I plan to attend the one at 600 Mr. Joe White Blvd. Sunday at 3:00pm. Want to join me? There will be safety and health information, live music, children’s activities, food and treats, and more.

June is summer in full swing. Long daylight hours. Enjoying warm evenings. A change of pace.

I think most Mother’s Days I write a musing. It’s a good day to stop and think about my own mother, and my grown daughters who are mothers, and all the women around the world who are mothers. Here is my 2023 look at them.

First, I have to say, somehow I was extremely lucky/blessed to have been born into a family with a mother who truly fit the bill: she was devoted to her children, and she was a kind, and caring woman, an okay cook (ha – I loved some of her special meals), She sacrificed for the three of us at times. She put in hard work without complaining. When I think of her I picture her in our finished basement, ironing clothes in front of the TV. Back then everything needed to be ironed. I also think about all the prep work she did to get us ready for our camping vacations. I think about her as the perfect pastor’s wife, and teaching Sunday school and Vacation Bible School. Singing in the choir – she had a lovely voice. As third of us three I don’t ever remember having a disagreement or yelling match with my mother, and for that I can thank my sister who paved the way. Ha Mom loved her role as wife and mother, and I don’t think she ever had regrets about being the woman she was. I don’t remember hearing she and my dad fight but I am sure on occasion there must have been disagreements. Every marriage has them. Generally, though, I grew up in a very harmonious home. Not much yelling. I never ever doubted I was wanted.

I have followed in her footsteps in the same way. It’s funny how you do turn out to be like your mother as the expression goes. I didn’t have to work as hard with the daily tasks thanks to more modern technology, but as my mother, I have always put family life first. I live my home life now like she did. I thank her for being the role model she was to me.

So many women are not so lucky.

And I guess that’s where this musing turns now: to all the women out there, all who are mothers, who don’t have the blessings I had – and the ability to make choices. Many mothers don’t have a supportive husband and the comfort of basic needs. Here in America, at our southern border, in war-torn Ukraine, and all around the globe, mothers are hanging on – to their child, to their hopes, to whatever they can to make life better. They are mothers that don’t give up but still deal with a lot of pain and uncertainty.

There is a connection with all mothers. Once you become one you are part of ‘the group’ — the sisterhood of women who understand both the joys and challenges of raising children. The love of them is greater than anything else. So, it’s hard not to think about ALL mothers on “Mother’s Day.” Some are feeling love today, getting flowers, and going out for a nice buffet lunch. They deserve it. But, others are not getting special treatment. And, then there is the silent group of women who desperately wanted to be a mother but for some reason couldn’t. Today is a hard day for them too.

Motherhood means looking beyond yourself. Putting children first. Rare is the woman who births a baby and then doesn’t experience the awe of it all. When women become mothers they look at the world differently. They care for others who need a hand. They hurt when seeing other’s pain. They nourish by giving what they can. They comfort. They provide sympathy. Kiss a boo-boo. Sing a lullaby.

They do their best where ever they are. Yes, for sure we celebrate the wonderful mothers here in the US on this day. But we celebrate those waiting south of the border for asylum. And hiding children from bombs in dark basements. And we think of so many other places where perhaps food is scarce, and medical care is expensive, or education is only for the men, and where there is no daycare to try to work and make ends meet. Juggling. Sometimes doing without.

Here’s to ALL the mothers doing their best. Feeling tired at times. But never giving up. Putting children first. Spreading love.

Happy MOTHERS day to them all. ❤️

Since Title 42 is about to expire and many Americans are worried about the influx of immigrants, I thought I’d put in my two cents and offer a different viewpoint.

First, let’s all remember that these are people. Human beings. Families. Children coming to the border with their parents. Let’s NOT lose the humanity in any decision.

They happen to be people born somewhere in Central America or South America.

Almost all of the people migrating to the US southern border are coming to have a better life. Some are escaping threats from drug lords, some are leaving lands where there is political persecution, some are looking for better paying jobs, some want an education, and some want safety for their children. They still hear about the “American Dream”” and they want a small piece of it. They are willing to risk a lot to travel thousands of miles, with little on their backs, and with constant fear of attack along the way.

Yes, the numbers sound big – we hear on the news how many slip through and enter illegally. Thousands of others are waiting on the Mexico side of the border waiting for Title 42 to end in hopes they can make it in easier..

I can’t help but think about other countries, other places around the world, where people are also fleeing from war, and from lands that have political strife. Neighboring countries are not treating them less than human. Neighboring countries are helping them find a place to stay, some food, and they are not taking away their dignity. Because, you know what? It’s not their fault that they were caught living in a spot of turmoil. All around the globe people are effected by things they have no control over.

Soon we will see on the news video of people at our southern border – and it will look like they are ‘bad people’ and that they are ‘breaking our laws’ – but I hope you can look at them as individuals, family members, wanting a safe, and better life. If they could enter legally they would. But our system right now is slow, and we are not prepared to vet properly and do all the paper work needed. We need to take on some of the blame. Why do we not hire more in the Immigration Department to speed up the path in? Why can’t we employ Americans to help process those wanting asylum here? Help them get to relatives in the states? Give them a chance to work, often in jobs not desired by others.

As a Christian, I have felt all along that it is against the teachings of Jesus to build walls, and to push people away when they are in need. I’m not naive enough to realize this is a complicated issue, and that there are some mixed in the masses that are not of good character. That too is humanity. But certain media outlets emphasis the bad and don’t balance out the report and tell of those who want to be here the right way.

The United States can and should vet those who want to enter our country, and we can work harder, hire more and create more jobs in immigration, and in the meantime we can realize that we ALL are the same. It’s a mindset – and a positive mindset creates positive action. We ALL have the same desires – for love, safety, and to live in peace.

So, look at those faces you see on the news. They are tired from traveling, often walking for days, and they are tired from living in fear for so long. Think about how we can help them, and not stop them from an opportunity here in the United States. Be kind. Be that person that gives a hand out to help. Be that person that sees humanity. Be that person who realizes chance and circumstance have given us our life here in the US. We are children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren of immigrants too. How blessed we are.

Those who come to the border want to be like us.