I sit here and think about how it was for me growing up in the late 1950s and the 1960’s. I was born on the tail end of 1956 so really I do not have memories of the 1950s, of those first 4 years of my life. It’s weird how babies and toddlers learn so much so quickly in their first years of life but yet they don’t have a way to remember people and events from them.

So, my earliest recollection is when I went to kindergarten. It’s just a quick picture in my mind of being in my class, which was only a half day, yet still having a nap or quiet time midway through the morning. The teacher would darken the overhead lights in the room and we would get our mats (I think mine was a small rug) out of our cubbies (or the cloakroom) and lay down for a bit. It was probably only 20 minutes or maybe a half hour. I don’t think anyone fell asleep, or if they did, would stay asleep for very long.

I did not go to preschool before kindergarten. So, kindergarten was the first time of learning. I don’t remember the baby and toddler toys I had at home, but back then they weren’t made to do anything but to enjoy some play. I’m guessing I had the usual: the blocks, a baby doll, etc. and perhaps they were hand-me-downs since I was the third and last child in the family.

So kindergarten back then was much like what we think of as preschool is now. It was about learning numbers and the alphabet, and it was a time of learning to share, and to follow a bit of a structured schedule. It was an introduction to school.

I don’t remember if we had toddler books at home. I don’t remember if my parents read to me when I was really little. That bothers me. I wish I knew. Although, I know back then it was not encouraged as it is now with babies and toddlers. The first books I do remember reading on my own were the Bobbsey Twins series. My real love of reading and books came much later, when I was the chauffeur mom driving my own kids around. I learned to always carry a book with me because I spent a lot of time waiting in my car. This was before cellphones. So, for me it was easier to wait – and read. Once I joined my first book club I was hooked.

I did read to my daughters every night at bedtime. I remember it well because even though the girls had their own rooms, one would come to the others room for bedtime book time. As a mom of young ones it was often the first time I ‘chilled out’ and I remember reading myself to sleep! Sometimes I would be falling asleep and start reading gibberish and my girls would say “Mom, those aren’t the words!” Ha! I also remember hubby coming up to check on me when I didn’t come back downstairs and finding me fast asleep with them.

These days the learning process starts pretty early. My twin grandsons went to preschool and were ready to do a full day of kindergarten this past year. They are learning words and putting sentences together now. They have had books reads to them since birth. Especially, each night before bedtime. My granddaughter goes to daycare which is also a preschool environment. She too seems to pick up many skills early on, and she learns quickly and joyfully.

I think about how important it is to give all children the same opportunity because now schooling doesn’t start with kindergarten. If a child has not gone to a preschool they will walk into a kindergarten classroom already behind some of the other children in the room. It can cause low self-esteem in the child. It can lead to struggles in catching up. It can be the start of a negative feeling about school.

Most preschools cost money. There are some “Head Start” programs around, funded by the government. There are also charitable programs, some run by churches. Here, where I live, is an excellent at-home program called “Miss Ruby’s Kids” where trained volunteers go into homes and teach young children AND their caregivers. Often a parent, or grandparent, does not have the reading ability themselves, and therefore they cannot help the child. This program brings in to the home the teacher, some free books, and other educational toys. Funding comes from caring donors, and matched corporate funds.

When I think back to how I got my early education when I was little, I don’t think my way was really any different from all the other kids at that time. I went to a suburban public elementary school. There were not as many options back then compared to now. Kindergarten was the very first stepping stone and we all started out the same way.

I wish I remembered more from that time back then. I can’t blame my lack of knowing from being old(ish) now. Ha. It’s not that my memories have faded. I never had clear memories from that age. And, back then we didn’t have lots of pictures and selfies and videos like children have now. That may help them recall better when they look back on them.

Even though toddlers don’t remember the specific memories from those years, it is the foundational time of feeling love, and safety, and knowing they are cared for by parents. Studies show that without it a person can have a life full of challenges.

I may not remember specific memories before kindergarten, but thankfully, I always felt that my foundational needs were met – and more.

My blog. My opinion. My view of politics.

For quite a long time now I have watched the leaders of both political parties and I have come up with some views of how I see them.

I have to say that I do not follow any of the conservative media outlets, and I am glad I do not, because I think I would feel the following even more deeply. More sadly. More caught up in wallowing. What I see is that the two parties are very different in how they speak and how they deal with issues.

One is ‘the party of complaints.’

Do you know which one I mean?

One party feels like everyone is out to get them. This party feels like there is a big, bad, but somehow quiet, group (the deep state) that is wanting to take them down. They love to blame this ‘other group’ for going on witch hunts and for having tons of time to work on undermining anything they don’t agree on. This party often speak like little kids, and they act no better.

This party loves to keep citizens in a fearful position. I have seen it over and over. They thrive on using fear. They want us to look at the negative side of everything happening within our country. The way they talk all the time is always to complain, because it is all bad – no good anywhere. There has been absolutely nothing good happening the last four years, and it’s NOT ANY OF THEIR FAULT.

This party has allowed one man to get too much power, and then use the scare tactics (he’s an expert at it), and they continue to stand by him even after the thousands of lies, a truly LOST election (yes, he lost), two impeachments, and after two criminal trials have found him guilty. More cases are pending. Somehow, and I don’t know how, they overlook every mean thing he says and does. And then they….

Complain, complain, complain.

“They are out to get us. They have people in the justice system who want to take us down. They don’t want to help out regular guys like me. They don’t understand how close we live to being in debt. They raise our prices and don’t care. They give handouts. They let illegals in who are taking all our jobs. They bring in all the drugs and get our kids addicted. They want to pay off tuition, but I never got to go to college. It’s not fair. We Christians are losing ground. We deserve to be seen. We started this country, It should be ours.”

Blah blah blah.

The party I speak of is, of course, the Republican Party, which used to be known as the fiscally responsible party. They used to be a party that believed strongly in a work ethic, and in democracy and capitalism, and in letting citizens live free from government restrains. I remember them.

If that was still the case, Republican legislators would be spending their precious time finding ways to get rid of government waste, and they would work for job opportunities, and they would be looking to open new business opportunities, and they would promote advances for America. They would WANT to work with their Democratic counterparts to pass bills and laws.

But they are too busy complaining.

They have become the party that acts like a whiny child, that thinks a bully is just out to get them.

I think it is such a shame to use so much time on all of the negativism, and on blaming others. They could do so much more. They could act like grown ups and work on projects instead of crying all the time about how bad everything is.

It’s interesting that while the Republicans have been complaining, the unemployment numbers have gone down, the economy is coming back from CoVid shutdowns (when we had shortages, transportation problems, etc.), and insulin prices have been capped for many. Covid is no longer a pandemic. Of course, not everything is better – food prices are up due to world shortages and transportation issues. Gas prices are like a roller coaster (but they always are due to supply and demand – and world oil prices.) Housing and rent is too expensive.

Now “they,” the Democrats, are still focused on issues that can move our country forward, and they want to make all citizens live a better life in America. They want medical care – and low prescription prices. They want anyone who wants to go to school to have the opportunity. They want to lower gun violence. They want women to have equal rights and the freedom to do what is right with their bodies. They want to preserve nature.

But, positive change is happening. And, moving forward is always a good thing. Let’s not look back except to learn some lessons. Just stop whining about wanting to make America like it used to be. Stop all the complaining. It’s getting old.

Seriously, sitting back and blabbing without doing anything isn’t a good look. I wonder how those that complain and complain ever get beyond themselves. Maybe they don’t. I mean, look at their leader. Do they prefer to wallow in misery? Do they feel like the bigger person when they continually blame others? Or, do they want people to feel sorry for them?? Are they the ‘pity party?’

The two parties are so very different.

One is always complaining. One isn’t.

Happy June 1st! Before I move on to this new month I still want to say a couple of things about last month.

May is always a good month for me. As I have said in past posts, I love the weather, and I love how my flower garden comes alive. It’s also the month of hubby and my wedding anniversary. (See last post.)

This year I ended May with a quick trip to Nashville, one of my favorite places to go. It takes a lot to get me to leave my ‘home sweet home’ but heading to Music City will do it! On my first evening there I was able to mark something off my bucket list: being in the audience and enjoying the live country music at the Grand Ole Opry. For those who don’t know the history of the Opry, it started out as a radio show that highlighted country music artists who performed live. Almost 50 years ago. WSM was the radio station, and the airwaves were filled with country music when other stations didn’t play lots of music of that genre. The show grew into a live event each week at an old church in Nashville, called The Ryman. For years and years people came and sat in pews and participated in the radio show. In recent history the country music community built its own Grand Ole Opry theatre on the outskirts of town, and it is dedicated to live music still aired on radio to this very day.

The format is usually 6 artists or groups who play three songs each. I was fortunate to see a wonderful mix of some older singers, and some new ones. I also saw some amazing musicians! The lineup was Jeanne Seely (she is in her 80’s now and a long time member of the Opry), Tyler Braden, Maddie and Tae, an amazing harmonica virtuoso Michael McCoy, Earnest, and T. Graham Brown (older too but recently inducted into the Opry.)

Then, the following day and night I met up with a dear ‘old’ (in terms of how long we have known each other) friend, who I first got to know well in high school. Paula and I became fast friends then, back in the day without IPhones, etc. and I remember so well how she would leave her house and walk towards mine and I would leave mine at the same time, and we would ‘meet in the middle’ (and yes that’s a country song!), and we did countless sleepovers, laughed at the same things, and did all the same school activities together.

When we got into college, different ones in Ohio, we stayed in touch, and life continued on – but we always stayed in each others lives, even if long periods of time went by. I think there are only a few childhood friends that remain special throughout life, and she is one of them.

So, the really cool thing is: my girlfriend’s son has broken into the music world thanks to TikTok, and then touring, and people seeing his potential. He is played on Indie radio stations. He played in Nashville my second night in town, so we made a point to go and see him with his band. It was wonderful!! Paula and I were ‘bandies’ in high school (band nerds) and so it is cool to see her son take his musical ability to a whole ‘nother level!

While in Nashville I also did some ‘daytime drinking’ (yes, a country song) at the Lower Broadway honky tonks. A few new ones have opened and I wanted to check them out. Garth Brooks has one now. Eric Church too. Morgan Wallen’s and Lainey Wilson’s bars were getting ready to open up, so I will have to go to those on my next Nashville trip, whenever it might be.

During my time in Nashville the jury went into deliberation in the Trump ‘hush money – falsified documents’ case. As I have written about earlier, I get pretty wrapped up in watching court trials. I also have felt all along that Trump has avoided prosecution for years and he has been guilty of illegal practices. And, I really feel he is an unethical (and immoral) man who does not deserve to be our president again.

So, my time in Nashville was a good distraction. Yet, once the verdicts came in I stayed in my hotel room, ordered room service, and caught up on the aftermath of it.

That leads me to today, June 1st. It’s a new month and we here in the United States now have a convicted felon running for president, almost assured to be the Republican candidate. This is unprecedented in many ways. All the talking heads on the pseudo-news networks have plenty to opine about for the coming months.

I do not watch conservative media outlets. I never have because I don’t relate to their point of view. I also do not watch the ultra-liberal outlets because I easily see their slant too, and really, I just want true and factual news. It is hard to find these days.

The next months up to November and the presidential election are going to be bumpy – and I worry. I feel that especially on the far right we will see a lot of mean talk from candidates and citizens, and even some hot heads will turn to violence. I have lived my life as a pacifist, and I want the same peaceful life for everyone, and I just can’t stand to see people lash out physically, with violence, and with guns. Heaven help us.

Both presidential candidates are old. Both are feeble in their own ways. Will they make it to November? The bigger question: will they make it for four more years??

June is officially the first month of summer and this season always brings vacations, and outdoor activities, and more concerts. I look forward to all it brings! In general, I think it’s easier to be happier in the summer months. There are long days of sun and daylight. Lots of time outside! It’s also a slower pace.

In my family both my daughters have their birthday this month. Both son-in-laws have summer birthdays too. There is always lots to celebrate. All of these grown ‘kids’ are exceptional and I enjoy who they are, and how they have created their own beautiful families. I look forward to spending time with them and their children. Oh, and I have two Tim McGraw concerts coming this month, and one is with daughter #1.

Today we turn the calendar page. So, I say goodbye to May – and hello to June!!

Remember when you were a kid and people that were 40 years old seemed so old? Well, today hubby and I are celebrating a big 4-0 but it’s not our age. It’s our 40th wedding anniversary!!

40 years married! What?!?

I was not a teenage bride either so I am amazed at the milestone that we are now reaching here together.

Before we married both of us had spent a good part of our 20’s on our own, graduating from college, living the single life, starting our careers, and enjoying life with friends. I know for me it turned out to be good timing because I first learned to be self-assured, and to pay my own bills, and to really handle most everything. I was not looking for a man to ‘take care of me’ or to ‘complete me’ as Jerry McGuire said in the movie. I learned I could take care of myself.

Hubby and I knew each other as casual acquaintances first. We hung out with the same group of friends at our local restaurant/bar. We lived in an area of apartments filled with ‘20 somethings’ and we all would meet up after work for food and drinks at the establishment in our local strip shopping center. It was a really fun time in our lives. Reading this back it sounds like an episode of “Friends.” Ha

But, once he took a job in another state, he started thinking of who he could see being with long term, as a partner. He actually made a list of qualities he wanted and then thought of women he knew who had most of them. I was in the top two! Woohoo! I learned this later.

When we started dating we kind of knew that this was ‘it’ quickly. As I remember, our dating started in the early summer of 1983, and then at the beginning of November we got engaged. Back then you could throw together a wedding much more quickly than today, so we married May 26th of 1984. We picked Memorial Day weekend because it gave our guests an extra day for traveling.

Looking back on it I am sure some of our family and friends must have thought it was a rather quick ‘courtship’ (how’s that for an old term?) but we had experienced our share of dating others by then, and we were ready to move on to a new, exciting phase in our lives – together.

Timing is everything!

Yes, I truly believe that timing is important when it comes to relationships. Had we both been younger we would not have been ready to commit to each other. I also felt from the beginning that God had a hand in putting us together. We both had gone through failed relationships in the past. And, for some reason when we got together we clicked. Who can explain it?!

So, we were ‘ready’ and we were of the age for commitment and an adventure together. 1984.

Our years of growing together, and having our daughters, and moving around the country with job changes, made us strong – because in a way it was us against the world. Shortly after our wedding we moved across the country from Virginia to California for a job opportunity. We knew nobody else. Family was all on the eastern half of the US. We had a new home, new jobs, and a baby on the way.

As the early years went on by we continued to move with career changes for hubby, and then we had another daughter.

Thankfully, once our girls got school age we were able to settle in in one town so their elementary through high school years were in one place: New Jersey. I remember asking hubby how long he thought his new job would have us living in New Jersey and he said 4 or 5 years. Well, we lived in there for 12 years! It gave our daughters stability, and a great education. But, I must admit it challenged me the whole time. Oh New Jersey. Ha!

In all we have moved nine times. (I learned company moves are easier than ‘doing it yourself.’)

What I also learned from the many moves, and from the changes in our lives, is that you make it work because it is what you want together. We never disagreed on that. We still don’t disagree about accepting the changes and making the best of them.

40 years means accepting lots of changes, and learning to go with the flow, to always prioritize our family, and to look forward to what comes next. Hubby and I still do that.

40 years means growing old together.

40 years means knowing each other better than any other human being on this planet.

40 years means allowing independence too.

40 years means looking back at a ton of memories with a huge smile.

40 years means we have gone from parenting to grandparenting.

40 years means lots of laughing.

40 years means accepting differences.

40 years means sharing experiences.

40 years means unconditional love.

Welcome to the first day of the Memorial Day weekend. Monday is Memorial Day but it is really the travel day for those who have gone to the beach or mountains for a little getaway. It’s the day to get back home to get ready for work again.

So, ahead of time, I hope we take a little bit of time to remember at some point over the weekend and honor all of those who have given their lives while serving in one of our military forces.

It’s a good time to remind ourselves that those who died in action did it to preserve our democratic way of life here in the United States of America. They did it to make sure dictators of other countries don’t use their power to take us over. They died in hopes that all our children will get to continue to live the “American dream.”

We live in a wonderful place. The United States was founded with much thought about how this land should offer endless possibilities for everyone here. The writers of the Constitution had seen what had gone wrong in other places, and because of it they fled from England, wanting to start a better system, one where everyone counted, where everyone was equal.

All of those who have put their lives on the line (and given their lives) since our country’s inception are being memorialized this weekend.

Throughout the years our country has faced many challenges from outside, and yes, from inside.

Right now we are definitely dealing with a group within the United States who want to change the American Dream. There is a group who want to take away freedoms, who wants to hold power over others, who want to say who is allowed in and who is out.

Democracy as we know it is at risk. And as I try to understand why this group wants to change our system of checks and balances, and change our 3 equal branches of government, and too often disregards our ‘united’ states vs. separate states, I hope this is a wake up call for us all. We can never be lazy about it. We can not take for granted our system of government. It is tested all the time. Thankfully, so far it has survived.

But we have new kinds of attacks. Technology is a big one. The misuse of social media, putting out lies after lies and conspiracy theories, and the use of network TV outlets that lean every story for pushing an agenda. It has done so much damage.

The other new attack we face comes out of the mouths of our own political leaders. They continually speak lies as truth. They totally disregard facts and are vulgar to others who think differently. It has been nonstop to the point of thinking it is normal. But – it should never be normal.

When I think of all of those we will honor this Memorial Day weekend, and all that they fought for – to preserve our democracy – I am saddened, and I wonder what they would think seeing this America right now.

Perhaps this weekend we can think deeper about how to come back together, to be respectful to all, to remember that our country was founded on a beautiful democratic system with values of equality and fairness. It is an ongoing challenge. But our lost ones deserve us to try better.

I have had a busy couple of weeks and I finally have some quiet time today at home. It seems like a good time to write about this and that.

First, how is May halfway over already? It is one of my favorite months so of course it seems to fly by. If only January went this fast. Right?

Part of my time has been spent with helping and hanging out with my daughter and her family. She just had a new little baby girl so it has been a pleasure to hold the newborn and to help keep the 3 year old busy. These are special moments for sure. And they go by quickly. My older grandchildren, the twins, are already ‘little kids’ now busy with school and baseball, video games, etc. They are 6 1/2 and I find myself asking: How did that happen??

I also just got back from going with my daughter to a Tim McGraw concert. I have lost count on how many times I have seen him and his band live over the years. Maybe a dozen times. Probably more! There are a few artists that you never get tired of seeing in concert. I have a few, but Tim is my favorite. When I decided to listen to country music years ago I bought a Tim McGraw Greatest Hits CD. I wore it out. I started listening to all kinds of country music (really I have loved it all my life but I made the effort when I moved south). Over time, now in the download era, I have every Tim McGraw album on my phone. I love so many of the album cuts that have never made radio airplay. Of course, I also love the hits, and he has many of them. Part of the love of country music is how fans come together and sing together. We know the lyrics! Words are important. As they say: it’s 3 chords and a story! It’s storytelling.

Some of my days in May have been spent watching the Trump trial in Manhattan. This is the one where he is accused of knowing about, and wanting to lie on documents about ‘hush money’ being repaid to his ‘fixer’ Micheal Cohen. Trump had an affair with Karen McDoogel, but he also had a one night ‘wham bam thank you ma’m’ with a porn star, Stormy Daniels, and it is the money paid to her by Cohen, then reimbursed to Cohen, that was covered up. Why? To hide it from Americans about to vote? I find court trials interesting. I wish we could watch the Trump trial but since we can’t the reporters are sending out much of the happenings in the courtroom via text messages. I like listening to the on air lawyers and reporters as they analyze what is happening. I like to know as much as I can before I make an opinion.

That leads me to this: Lately I have been writing some posts about my childhood. I was just an average student in high school. I got mostly B’s, a few A’s, and even once got a D. I must not have applied myself much or felt the push to get better grades. Once I got to college I did do better and I graduated cum laude. I got my degree. I got my first job through a college internship my senior year. One of the reasons it worked out for me is that I was hard working, and did whatever was asked of me, and I was always kind. I learned so much from the people I worked for and with, at all my jobs over the years. I worked in radio and TV and I was just happy to be among the pros. One person I admired was a woman, Denise Oliver, who was the Program Director at the radio station where I worked, and she also had a daily on-air shift. It was rare for a woman back then to hold a management position. Denise was a perfect mix of seriousness, honesty, drive, and she remained a feminine woman. For a short time I was lucky enough to be her assistant. She moved on to a national broadcasting business out of New York.

The reason I write of Denise is that right now, in the news, we are reeling from the graduation speech given by Kansas City Chiefs kicker Bukner. He addressed the group of young people, who were about to receive their diplomas after 4 or more years of study, and instead of lauding that, he spoke of being a wife and mother. He was a man telling women that their purpose and greatest joy was in the home.

Well, for many women, yes, getting married and having children is very fulfilling. it is for me! I don’t know what direction my life would have taken me if I had not met my husband, had our daughters, and now our beautiful grandchildren. But, I do know that I had an education as a foundation, and I had work experience and I loved my vocation – and I would have been a happy and successful woman. I have always had belief in myself because I know I can take care of myself. As far as I know Denise never married and she became an amazingly successful woman in her career – and she was and is happy. We women make our ways by making our own choices.

Hmmm. And that should not be only in business. A woman’s life includes deciding on if and when to have a child. It’s a personal decision. Government has no place in that decision.

Separating government from religion…

That leads me to today – that it is Pentecost. Today is the day when the Christian faith I grew up in celebrates the day the Holy Spirit descended on to the people, and they had little tongues of fire over their heads. My Lutheran background tells me that God is a triune God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. The spirit moves upon us, and can be like a little nudge, to help us, to quietly speak to us, to teach us the ways of the Father and the Son. Pentecost is also considered the Birthday of the Church. The people, filled with the Holy Spirit, left their homes, travelled, and spread the Word of God to people in other lands.

I’m going to end this so I can turn on the golf tournament in a few minutes. Sundays is always a great day to watch the final rounds. This one is a bit unusual with the arrest of the Number 1 golfer in the world, pro Scottie Scheffler, on Friday morning. What a crazy thing! What I know of Scottie is that he is a humble, and quiet guy. He never creates controversy. He just became a daddy for the first time. So, whatever happened with the cop that morning just seems like it must have been a big misunderstanding, and it was certainly nothing Scottie intentionally did. But, yet, I support the police and know they have a difficult job every single day.

One thing I have learned in all my years is that life is full of nuances. Small actions can change things. There is often no black and white. We must keep that in mind and take time to hear both sides – be it golf, or politics, or religion, or women’s rights and choices.

Do we judge before giving someone the benefit of innocence? Do we think WE KNOW better and we don’t allow for other possibilities??

Do we offer our opinions as just that…. And not judgements on others?

Good Monday morning and Happy May to you! May is one of my favorite months of the year. Spring is here, and my flowers are blooming brilliantly! My perennials surprise me in May when they come back after the garden has been cold and empty. The weather is warm now, and around here I enjoy the occasional thunderstorm. My garden does too. (My heart goes out to those who have suffered from the outbreak of tornadoes. It’s been a bad month in the Midwest already.)

May has a couple of holidays, the kind I like, because they don’t bring on any stress for me. No need for lots of shopping or decorating. No expectations. Just fun.

Thoughts rattling around my brain this morning:

What is wrong with a woman who openly writes about shooting her dog and a goat? I mean. Why? Why do it? Why write about it? I know some people grow up on farms and ranches and have a different viewpoint about ‘livestock’ and don’t get personally connected to animals. But, dogs… dogs are pets. They become family members. Yes, some are used for hunting – which is a whole ‘nother topic to get into at another time. I have loved many dogs and I sometimes prefer them over people. They are loyal and loving. Shooting a puppy (it was under 2 years old) is just cold and heartless. And, then to write about it? Wow. I don’t get it.

The Trump trial continues this morning. Have you watched any of it yet? Please, don’t be a person who puts your head in the sand and just wants to ignore the illegal behavior of this man. It’s too important. This is the first trial with others to come, though not fast enough. But, if you haven’t realized yet, there is a pattern to his behavior. I feel a ‘need’ to write about the subject of Trump because too many people still don’t seem to have open eyes to the man. These people are tuned into the fake news outlets and to the lying social media sites. They have been told that we are the ones who have been fooled, but it’s the other way around.

Yesterday I had two different examples of homosexual fear show up. First, I rang handbells with a group at a Methodist church that has left the UMC and has now joined a World Methodist organization. I knew that the split facing the Methodist churches was over acceptance, or lack of, homosexual marriages, homosexual pastors, and homosexual weddings performed in the churches. After playing during the worship service yesterday there was a meeting in the sanctuary about the changes in the church. (Does anybody else besides me see the irony of calling the room a sanctuary?) While I put my bells away I listened to the updates and my heart hurt. People speaking of homosexuals as ‘others’ or as ‘something else’ than individual, loving human beings. Another bit of irony from my point of view: the sermon given just minutes earlier was about living a Christian life, following Jesus, and His Great Commission to go and be fishers of men. In other words, go out into the world, teach about Jesus, be an example of his teachings, and live a life of love for everyone.

Then a neighbor came by and visited us yesterday evening. Hubby, and I enjoy sitting on our screened porch with him from time to time. Our conversations are always interesting. Somehow we got to talking about attending church, and Christian beliefs as far as homosexuals. As I said, our talks are not dull!! My neighbor is certainly not alone in what he said, but I tried to figure out if he was speaking from a place of fear… or believing that God doesn’t like homosexuals and condemns them, or what. I said God does not make mistakes and I believe homosexuals are born being that way just as we are as heterosexuals. We did not choose our sexuality.

The subject was changed. I have always believed that if you don’t understand something, then at least give it the consideration it deserves. Saying ‘no’ to something like sexual orientation is close-minded, and it is not showing God’s love for all. My two cents. Seriously, I can’t imagine being a person trying to live your true life and having Christians not believe you. And worse, not being considered as equal in the eyes of God. (Truth: we are ALL equal in the eyes of God.)

Okay, change of subject…

Well sort of…

As a child I thought like a child. Thank God for that. The serious, debatable topics never entered my mind. But, by the time I got into my 20’s I had a foundation for my beliefs. I can only think it came from my parents and family life, from the schools I went to, from peers who I felt comfortable hanging with, and my own innate personality. All of those aspects made me think how I do now.

It is the same for others. Nobody can escape their foundation. But, life doesn’t stand still – and it never should. A closed mind tries to stop the moving forward, and it stops the ability to accept not knowing everything, or being able to grow by learning more.

I admit I struggle to find people who feel the same way. I can’t find friends who want to discuss, to learn, to accept. I find too many with closed minds. It has turned me inward. It has made my writing here important to me.

So, I sit here on the couch with my sweet dog on one side of me, and my kitty cat snuggled up on the other side.

I’m getting ready to head out for the day. It’s a beautiful May Day…. And I’m going to my weekly church quilting group (that never talks about issues) to help make warm gifts of love, and to a handbell rehearsal after it. We will work on making a joyful noise to the Lord…. A musical fit to the one who loves us all. The one who gets us even when we don’t always get each other.

As I sit and listen to the CNN reporters and lawyers give the ‘play by play’ of Trump’s Trial on Hush Money and Falsified Documents to cover it up, I thought I’d go back in time again. As I did in my last post, I will write a little about a childhood memory.

I am closer to 70 then 60 years old now – which I truly can’t believe. All of my adults years (so far!) I have remained very healthy and I know it has not been due to anything specific that I have DONE, but more that I have some good genes and have lived with enough education to know what is good for my body. In general, moderation in life may be considered ‘safe’ and even boring, but moderation in eating and in exercise has done me well.

Up to this point, as an adult I have only been admitted in to the hospital twice. They were for both of my daughters’ births. Both were c-sections. The first one came as a surprise when my doctor realized at the last minute that my baby was in a breech position. She was ‘butt first’ and could not get herself down the birth canal. My second c-section was planned because my doctor said it was my choice, and ‘V-backs” (vaginal birth after a cesarean) were not always successful.

This post is about my only other hospital stay, when I was 10 years old. Leading up to it my mother had noticed a bump on my right leg, below my knee. It looked to be the size of half of an egg sitting under the skin. As I recall, the doctor did not do a needle biopsy, and he felt it would be best to do surgery to remove it, and then send some cells off to the lab for a diagnosis. Thinking back on it now I’m sure my parents were concerned about what the bump was. I had not injured my leg. I did not have pain from it. So, perhaps cancer was a concern. If so, they kept it to themselves. My surgery was successful. I had 27 stitches in a large S shape below my knee. The procedure took place at “Babies and Children’s Hospital” in Cleveland, Ohio.

I remember sharing a hospital room with a younger girl. I want to say she was 7 years old, and she had had heart surgery. I think she had been there recovering before I arrived, before I became her roommate. She seemed to be doing okay. Thankfully. I stayed in the hospital for a few days. I remember I had to show the doctor that I was able to move my leg and that I could get up and down, and move myself around. I used my left leg under my bandaged right leg to lift it and get around. I went home on crutches.

Once home my mother set me up on our back screened porch. As a ten year old girl I recovered quickly and I remember liking some of the special attention I was getting.

The biopsy showed no cancer. It was called a calcium deposit. I don’t know why I got it. I didn’t ever get one anywhere else on my body. I healed and was able to go on my merry way.

One lasting effect from the surgery and healing was that my right leg is now an inch or two longer than my left leg. The doctor said because I was a kid and I was growing, my cells worked overtime on that leg. Ha! There have been times that I feel like it has given me some mild back pain and pulls. And, I am aware that I tend to stand on my shorter leg.

My scar remains on my leg. Even after decades it is still quite visible.

My surgery was in the summer of 1966.

I was fortunate to have a good experience and outcome.

I am fortunate now to have these as my only hospital stays. But, as I age on I know I may end up there again sometime. God bless all those in hospitals who care for children to old people with their medical knowledge and lots of tender loving care.

Lately I have been wanting to blog, but not always about politics and issues that we face in America these days. So I googled ‘writing prompts’ and there are a ton of sites that can give ideas and subjects to consider.

One I thought might be fun is this: List and explain 5 things that I remember well from my childhood. So, here goes…

Let me first say, it is sometimes hard to separate my own memories on some things versus what others have said and from seeing photographs from my early years.

This list is in no particular order.

1. I remember when I was in 7th grade my parents decided to take me out of the Cleveland Heights, Ohio public school system due to concern about roughness in the schools. Both my older sister and older brother went to the very large middle school there (was it named Kirk Jr. High?) and I specifically remember that they wore ‘uniforms’ of collared shirts and pants for the boys, and ‘midi’ blouses (cotton, with a sailor style neckline) and skirts for the girls.

This was in the mid – to late 60’s and there was a lot of racial unrest, and I remember my brother was fearful going to and leaving school because ‘bullies’ hung out around the school and on his path to walk home. They acted tough, and stole things from other students.

So, by the time I was ready to head off to middle school, my parents chose to pay tuition and send me to St. John’s Lutheran School for 7th grade. My father was a Lutheran pastor so I suppose he had an ‘in’ for getting me enrolled. Some of my classmates from Caledonia Elementary also transferred with me so I already knew a few of the kids and that helped. Many memories stick out during that pivotal year.

One memory was that I played my flute with Sandy Suppes on clarinet at a band program. We worked for weeks on the duet and we had it down. And, thankfully, the piece went well – and I remember my mom saying what a good job we did. I was proud that she was proud.

I also remember that I got accused of talking in class when I was not supposed to, and I was very offended by it. I have always been a rules follower so I felt I was not guilty. Another girl was trying to talk to me, so we both got reprimanded. Our punishment was to have to stay after school for detention. Well, I lived pretty far away from the school so I missed the bus during the detention days, and I had to have one of my parents pick me up. One day though, a girlfriend and I decided to walk home. It took an hour and a half or so. Obviously there were no cellphones back then so I remember being in big trouble once I got home.

7th grade is an interesting time of growing! Right? I remember the boys being immature still and thinking it was funny to ‘snap’ the back of girls’ bras. I also remember it was the first time playing ‘spin the bottle.’ Ha! It was at school, and I remember sitting in a circle with a group of classmates, boys and girls… and ‘having’ to kiss whoever the spun bottle landed on. Mind you, it was a ‘peck’ but I was nervous because I had liked Steve Brady since 4th grade. He was in the circle. I don’t think we kissed. I don’t remember that we did and I think I would have remembered had it happened.

2. Going back in time, I had a teacher in 2nd grade named Miss Reed. I remember her name because she scared me. She seemed like an old bitty in my young eyes. She was mean, and she even inspected our fingernails to see if they were dirty, or if we bit them down.

3. My fourth grade teacher was the opposite. Ms. Hayes. She was kind. I remember that she kept a bottle of hand lotion on her desk and often used some and worked the lotion into her hands while talking with us. She was tall and had a pretty smile. I think I even ‘got’ to stay after some days and clean the chalk board and stamp out the erasers of chalk on the stoop of the classroom door that led outside. I remember doing it – as a nice thing. Not a punishment. During that time we still had recess right after lunch. We’d go out on the blacktop behind school and the girls would play “Chinese jump rope” (how not politically correct!) It was an elastic rope tied in a circle, that then went around the legs of two girls, and the other girls would take turns jumping in the middle, and making designs, etc. Fourth grade was also when we got ‘music time’ with flute-a-phones. I did okay with it, thanks to having taken piano lessons and knowing a little bit about notes and scales and such.

4. Back to 7th grade…. As it turned out I only went to that Lutheran school for one year. My dad took a new pastoral position in a smallish town called Bucyrus, Ohio. It’s near Mansfield for those that know Ohio. For those that don’t, it is halfway between Cleveland and Columbus. I started 8th grade in the middle school there. What I remember? Band. I played flute and shortly after I started there another girl named Noreen moved in to town too and also played flute. We bonded. I also remember going to my first dance there. It was held on the gym floor, which was raised up to double as a stage for the theatre. I think “Stairway to Heaven” was the big song then. And “Jeremiah was a bullfrog…” The girls hung together in groups. The boys stood together too. The only boy I remember who asked me to dance was a kid who ‘bless his heart’’ was a bit slow minded and had no rhythm.

5. Eighth grade also introduced me to Paula. She and her family moved into town, and they moved in directly across the street from Noreen. Paula was also in band. She played trombone! I guess that was a rebel choice at the time. Boys played trombone – not girls! She became my bestie along with Terri, and I can’t remember how Terri and I first hooked up. Maybe she or Paula remembers. We were called “The Three Musketeers” for the following years we were all together at BHS. We joined clubs together. Ate lunch together. Even were in school plays together. Paula and I were musical. Terri was athletic and she became a cheerleader.

Childhood friendships never go away. oh, many years can pass with little correspondence. But there is a place in the heart for those who you grow up with, and going through the experiences of teenage angst and all the goofiness and laughs together. I have recently reached out to both Paula and Terri. Thanks to email and social media it’s not hard to do, and response is quick. As it happens, Paula and I are going to meet up in Nashville at the end of May to see her youngest son perform. He, Michael Marcagi, has turned into a TikTok and Instagram sensation as a singer songwriter. He is in Europe touring right now. I follow him on IG. Gee, maybe he got his love of music from his mother and her band background!

Well, I listed really more than 5 childhood school memories just now. Once I got thinking it got me remembering more and more. A different time. Cherished memories.

Perhaps some of you reading this, who are about my age, can go back too and think back to that time and your experiences. I hope it makes you smile.

There is so much going on in the news these days. All of the many Trump trials and pre-trial issues, and the Supreme Court hearing the important cases on presidential immunity and abortion, and then individual state decisions…. And now the campus protests about the Israel – Gaza/Hamas war.

It is hard to keep track of everything, and to get true information, especially these days with so many sources that have their own agendas and slants.

One thing I do know – is that I do not know. What I mean is I have to do work, and read, and listen, and still I will never know everything about a subject. I do not know the history that leads to where we are with many of these issues. But, I am trying to learn. And, I do not know how the people directly involved really feel. I do know people are playing games with us as we try to keep up with the news.

Right now, I do not get the full picture about what is happening on some of the campuses across our country. I know that young people are getting emotional, and that they have found a problem they see in the world that is really affecting them. And it should. I am all for peaceful protests. I actually like seeing young people come out, and express themselves about how they feel. I have noticed that the escalations at protests (at least what I see on on videos) seem to happen once the police come in and try to break up the gatherings. I am not sure why they feel the need to do that. Except, I have heard that Jewish students feel nervous and I know that is not right. College campuses should be safe environments for teens and young adults as best as possible.

The attack by the terrorist group Hamas on to the Israeli people was heinous. It was beyond acceptable and it was certainly something the Israel government had to respond to, and they had to immediately work on getting back the hostages that were taken. As the months of killing, of this horrible war, have gone on, we have continued to see unimaginable destruction and death. Basic needs of food and shelter for the innocent people of Palestine is gone. There really is NO good of any kind happening anywhere in that area, the land of the birth of Christianity. And of course the land that the Jewish people have claimed as their promised land. The piece of land where many religions look at as the foundational spot. Moses walked there. Jesus walked there.

I know that the campus protests are aimed against Biden and the US government because they choose to provide Israel with financial and military support. I get the protests. It’s really hard to understand how we as a country can ‘take a side’ instead of working both sides to help them find peace. I think Sec. of State Blinken is doing that though. And, as this post is about, I really do not know all that has gone into trying to bring this horrible war to an end. But I do know some very bright negotiators are hard at work.

I know that I do not know. So I don’t want to take sides and for now I pray that peace can somehow come to the land.

I also don’t know about all the issues at our southern border. I’m not there. I have not spoken directly to those working the border. I have to rely on media sources, hoping the statistics they tell are accurate. I do not know what is in the hearts of those who have come to our border looking for a way in, and a way to start a new life. Some will say they are mostly terrible people, bringing in drugs, taking American jobs, increasing crime in our country. But others say that is not true, and that it is political talk used to divide us by political party leanings. I have seen news pieces about young families waiting at the border, hoping to come in and just have a small piece of the American dream. They want safety for their families, better job opportunities, education for their children, and really all the things those of us born here want also.

I know that I do not know. There are problems with our immigration system for sure. I know that putting smart and serious minds towards finding a better way is needed. More funding is needed. Problems won’t be solved without a real positive effort, a humane effort, and with working together. We haven’t had that yet. It’s become a political volleyball, and it’s not fair to the people waiting.

I know that I don’t know. So, I hope for the best outcome for those needing our help, and for the people there on the border, and for those first hand at the border, who are dealing with the influx. I pray that we look at all people as God wants us to see them, as neighbors, and as people just like us, wanting to live in peace, to provide, to work, and to be accepted.

I know I don’t know about the behind the scenes, private life of any president of the United States. I have never known a president personally. I did get to shake President Biden’s hand when he was campaigning and he came to my town. I sat and listened to him at a town hall gathering. That’s as close as I have gotten. But, all of the other presidents of my lifetime have been someone I know of only through media reporting and from watching speeches, appearances, and press conferences. I know some of their history. Not all of it. But today with social media and phones with cameras everywhere I know more of the last couple of presidents then the ones that led our country when I was a younger. I also have had more time as an older person to do my own research, to read books about them, to watch congressional hearings, and now to watch the Trump trials.

I know I don’t know everything about Trump or Biden. I do know that half of what I hear is probably not true. We are living in a time of really over-the-top, and distasteful, political fights. It amazes me how low some will go to win an election. Integrity, honesty, kindness, respect – all these attributes seem to be gone. Did Trump do illegal things to win? And then when he lost a second term and he claimed a ‘stolen election’ theory (he says it to this day), was there any truth to it?

I know I do not know. But I have my eyes and ears open. I am glad we will find out through our justice system. Trump has already been found guilty of defamation in court. Out of his own mouth, he shows us he likes to put down others, to make fun of people with disabilities, and vets, and others, and I find it very disturbing. I also know that the trial happening now will tell us if he did interfere with the campaign for president by hiding payoffs with false documents. (Covering up sexual affairs – one happened while his wife was home with a new baby.). The other cases coming up will tell us if he had a big hand in the January 6th insurrection, and whether or not he purposely took and hid classified documents.

I watched the Congressional committee investigation that led to Trump’s impeachment. I wanted to know.

Trump has shown me what kind of a person he is. I find him very disappointing and because he lies so much I do not believe anything he ever says.

As for Biden, I have watched to see what connection he had with his son Hunter and if there was a money trail of illegal actions when Biden was vice president. So far, nothing has been proven. Republicans have sure been trying to find something. I don’t know much about Biden except that he seems to sincerely value family, and he is working towards moving our country forward to a place where all who live here will have equal opportunities. Yes, I align with the Democratic platform on issues. So, yes, I lean that way.

But I know I do not know.

Nobody knows everything. We tend to talk like we do. Pride and personal beliefs lead us to opinions. OPINIONS.

But we do not know.