So, everyone knows I am not a fan of our president.  My post would be pages long if I went into all the reasons why.    Today his derogatory language and his selfish style went to a whole ‘nother level.   And, as I write this post, he is at another one of his many rally events, where he pumps his ego and revs up his ‘base’ (people who seem to be hypnotized to follow him no matter what.)  What other president has ever done this? What right does he have to do this – while we pay him?

This man who holds our highest office has been a daily liar, and a pompous egotist since taking office.   I don’t care if he or you thinks he is a good businessman in his past and that he thinks he will save you a few bucks in your paycheck.   I mean, I’d like you to have more money to live on – but a little more money is not worth what he has done to the office he holds, and now to the people who see America differently than he does.    NOTHING is worth it.

It scares me that so many people out there think it is okay.   On Election night I was deflated by that realization.  It just gets worse and worse.

He has now incited someone, or maybe a few people, to send bombs by mail to past presidents!   Do you get that???   And, bombs have been sent to Congress representatives, and a news organization.    This is big.  This is unbelievable.   This is not a game.

I hold him responsible.   My stomach churns watching him.   He has no understanding for what he says or tweets.   He is psychotic and unable to  have compassion for those who are experiencing this fear.   In fact, I think he likes it.

He is creepy.

I can accept that some of my family and friends have varying views but I really have a hard time getting how ANYBODY can think what happened today due to his words, his lies, his derogatory comments, is okay.   Where is your civility??  Where is common sense?

It’s truly unbelievable to me.    I’m so sickened.

I will do what I can to change this.  I will vote. I will speak out – because it’s beyond staying silent.

How far will we let this guy go?

How far???

 

Thinking back on the whole wedding weekend that just happened when my daughter married her guy, I think about her beautiful smile!  I think about her aura of joy and the glow she had all evening!     The.whole.time.     It was priceless!

Lots of work and preparation went into the special day.   Everything was done and  in place.  There was no doubt for me that it was a labor of love – all for her.   So many people came together to make it happen.  But you just never know if something might go sideways.   I guess for us it was the rain that came down hard as we made our way to the wedding site.   There were moments then of worry that the ceremony might have to go under the tent.  It would not have been  the end of the world but it certainly was not how we envisioned it.   Rain on a wedding day is supposed to be good luck. Right?    It rained.  And then just like that it stopped.

So she walked the long aisle of the Allee of the Live Oaks with her dad.   When she did she was a beautiful vision to behold!   The setting was gorgeous.  The music perfect.  The guests were there for her groom and for her.

So many thank yous must be said.

Thank you to the groom and his family for welcoming our daughter from the beginning of the relationship.  Thank you for our new friendship and mutual connection.    Thank you for hosting a really fun rehearsal evening!

Thank you to Pastor Dave and family for coming back to our little part of the world to make it official and to celebrate with us!   Such a special family to us!

Thank you to the vendors that made the ceremony and reception absolutely beautiful and tasty.    Kudos to the Bespoke Strings, Greg Nelson on guitar, DJ David Jacob, Beautiful Salon and Pinky’s Nails,   Austin’s Catering, Kelly and Ashlyn of GigiNoelle wedding planning, Charlene of Brookgreen Gardens,  Kelly’s mom who put together the most beautiful flowers!   Thanks to Carolina Limosine for safely getting our guests and wedding party around all day and night.

The bride’s wedding glow was due to all of the above people putting their expertise into a perfect event!   They set the scene.  They worked their magic!

But the bride really glowed most because so many of her favorite people in the whole world were there!   As her mother it made my heart swell to see all those who have loved her throughout her life come together.  Family and friends from different parts of her childhood, her dear college friends, work buddies from her life now!    Bridesmaids who stood by her and supported her.  Beautiful ladies all!!

Most of all, she glowed because she was confident and thrilled that she was starting her married life with the right man!   He is her friend, her travel companion, her love, her ‘other half’ now.   As her mother I am so happy that she has found him and that they will experience life together from here on out.

Yes, the wedding glow is a look…  and the bride definitely had it!  She was stunning!     But the wedding glow is also a feeling, and an emotion.  It is  love!

 

 

 

 

 

 

As my daughter prepares to marry this weekend, I want to take a minute here to share my love of her.

(I love BOTH my daughters equally and individually for who they are.)

From the day she was born she has brought joy to hubby and me.  She was an easy baby and toddler.  She smiled easily and watched her big sister a lot.  For awhile she called big sister ‘sissy’ because she couldn’t say her name.   It was so cute to hear in her little voice.

I figured out early on she was pretty smart.  She had a way of giving an adorable look and smile that said “how can you say no to me?”   And it was hard not to fall for  it.   When she was a toddler and we lived on a street full of children in Atlanta, she had the other moms wrapped around her finger with that look, that twinkle in her eye.  My next door neighbor Venita would tell me to ‘watch that one” because she has us figured out!     During that time we lived near her Nannie who lovingly called  her her “Sweetie Pie.”   Other nicknames: Krist-onian balon-Ian,  and K-Fab.

Once my daughter started school she jumped in from day one, using that smile, BUT also always earning her way.  From the beginning she took education seriously.  Her “type A” personality showed up at a young age.  She wanted top grades.  She wanted to excel in everything she did.    I never ever had to push her to do her work.

I think during elementary school it all came pretty easy for her, but I remember later in her education where she stayed up many late nights to study, to prepare the best she could.    Many a Friday afternoon she would come home from school, exhausted from the week, and fall  asleep on her bed.  I’d have to wake her for dinner.  We always had “Fabian Family Friday Dinner Out” and it was an important time for all four of us to spend together. Friends were welcome to join us. But, we kept the dinner tradition going for a long time.   I guess we are responsible for her love of dining out!

During her elementary years she also started violin lessons.  Her choice of instrument.   Not an easy one to learn.    She studied privately from 2nd grade through her senior year in high school.  She also played in the school and the county youth orchestra. She was in a strings group that played weddings and parties.   Did you know she can play?   She’s very talented.  One day she may pick it up again when  her life is not so busy.

She also dove into learning the Russian language in high school.   Again, her choice.  She got to go on her first trip to Russia in high school.  And, she continued learning all things Russian through college.  She did two more trips over there as part of her education, once spending a whole summer there, living with a Russian family.   At college she became president the Russian Club.

This daughter followed her father in terms of study and picked business as her major.   She was in the Honors college at College of Charleston, and she graduated with high grades.  She went on to achieve her Masters degree at UVA, and then studied and passed all parts of her CPA exam first time through.

Ok.  I’ve told you about her determination and her achievements.   But, there is much much more to my daughter!   She was a typical kid growing up.  She had her moments of defying me… testing me.   Oh, nothing bad.  But, she was strong willed and knew she could get to me.   And she did. Lol

Some of my favorite moments with her include:  our trips to Europe with the county orchestra. It was really mother-daughter time of sharing hotel rooms, exploring new places together, etc.  I was proud of her love of music and how it gave us the opportunity to spend time together.     I remember the many times in the car as I shuttled her to lessons and rehearsals.   I’d pick her up from school and bring a snack for her to eat on the way.  She had very long days!

As an adult, she and I have continued to  love the same music and  she has been my “concert partner” – really it started back in her college days.  I’d drive down to Charleston and we would meet up for dinner and then go to a live concert or musical theatre.  Now, we still enjoy it very much and I hope it never stops.

Recently she became a certified yoga instructor. Again, it’s something she discovered, went for, and it has made a big part of her life. I’m glad because I think it helps balance her busy lifestyle.

Words I use to describe my daughter:   Reliable, caring, smart, honest (she can’t keep secrets – ha), respectful, loving, family-oriented.     Her new hubby is getting me – and her dad and sister too.  I thank him for that.  We are a package deal!

People say we are a good family.   The “Fab Four”!!   I feel so blessed in so many ways as a family, and when moments like this coming weekend happen, I stop and thank God.   I don’t know WHY, but God is with us – always.

My daughter is a gift.  Like I started this post, what a joy she is!  I can’t wait to see her walk down the aisle Saturday.

 

Breathe.  Laugh.

My mantra right now.           Just breathe.   And laugh.

This is “wedding week” and I am Mother of the Bride. It’s an exciting time about to happen and it’s a joy to be able to be a part of my daughter’s special day.

The first guests arrive in town tomorrow. More and more come in on Thursday and Friday.  The ceremony and reception are Saturday.

I have tried to think of everything to be prepared – schedules have been made. The vendors are all set.  I have spent the past few months exchanging lots of emails with the wedding planner, the caterer, the venue manager, the DJ, the bakery, the musicians, etc.    Everybody has been paid.

I think I have kept it together well, but yesterday after a day of running errands and working on last minute ideas, I think my brain got frazzled.  I stopped to pump gas and could not figure out why the pump kept denying my card.  Had I used it so much it was worn out?!?    I got back in my car and pulled to a different pump thinking something must be wrong with that specific bay.   But, no, I had the same problem at the second pump.    What’s up??    It wasn’t until I got the gas station attendant to come out and help me that I realized I had been putting my bank code in instead of my zip code.   Over and over – and over again.

Marla.  Breathe.  Laugh about it.

Everything is set – except the weather.  We are five days away and the forecast is calling for some rain and possible thundershowers.    Breathe.   Laugh.   There is nothing I can do about it.

The couple will get married.  She will look beautiful.   The flowers will be fresh and lovely.  The family and friends will gather to witness it all.   Lots of pictures will get taken.

So,  I am reminding myself…

Breathe.   Laugh.

Yesterday was hubby’s birthday.   He didn’t want to celebrate it.   And I get that.   It is hard to watch days go by and to age.

I am feeling the passing of time a lot now.  In just a couple of weeks I wlll see my younger daughter get married.   Both of our daughters are now through school, they work hard at what they do, they have found their life partners, and one has made me a Mimi!   I’m very proud of them!   I couldn’t have asked for a better outcome for them!

But, time has gone by and I am definitely in another age category.   I’m in my 60’s (which I still have a really hard time believing) and I don’t like the changes I see happening with my body.   I think I have kept myself together pretty well up to this point.  I was blessed with good genes and I have stayed active all my adult life.  I’m not a dedicated workout person – at all.  But, I have done well keeping my weight the same for decades.  I have colored my hair for a long time too.  I try to think young and dress appropriately but not dowdy.

It’s getting harder.

Recently I have noticed my waist thicker. My skin is dry and scaly, and loose.  I have not gained weight but everything just looks different.

Lines are on my face.   Even the use of photo filters can’t take them away.

Now when my hair roots start to show they are ALL grey!

Oh woe is me, right?

I know many of you reading this think I am just feeling sorry for myself.   Aging happens.  I know all the sayings:   Better than the alternative, and wrinkles are laugh lines, and  it’s what is inside that counts.     This is no place for vanity.  I have so much and how blessed I am in so many ways!    True true true.

I’m just saying aging is hard sometimes.

I’m not worried about the end of my life.  That’s not it.  I am secure on where my soul will go.  I am a follower of Jesus and I look forward to whatever heaven brings.

Til then, I want to be my best self.  I want to ‘keep it together’ and stay strong.   So, I don’t look in the mirror as much.  I lather on lotion.  I move…  enough to stay active but not enough to do damage. I pray every day that I don’t have an accident or need surgery.    I work every day on reminding myself to live my life.

Birthdays come around pretty quickly now.  My hubby’s yesterday was another reminder of that.   Don’t get me wrong:   I’m glad he had another birthday!  And, I want future birthdays for me…

but sometimes it’s just amazing how quickly  time goes by.     Sometimes it’s hard to age.

 

 

Welcome to a new week – and a new month!

Here are a few of my thoughts that are rattling around in my head this morning.

* October can be a beautiful month here.   I hope it will be this year!  We have my daughter’s outdoor wedding planned for the 20th.   Fingers crossed that it will be a beautiful fall day in the lowcountry!  No more hurricanes and no more flooding, please.

*  I usually love football in the fall.  This year I am not into it as much as I have in the past.  Why? I’m not sure.  I guess both the teams I usually root for, the South Carolina Gamecocks and the Carolina Panthers, are not very stellar this year and it’s hard to sit and watch them play.   It’s painful sometimes.  I find myself rooting for the Cleveland Browns though  since they are such underdogs.  Yesterday they came soooo sooo close to winning again.

* This week will continue to be interesting with the Kavanaugh hearing and investigation. Will more come out about his past?  Will some things he said be dismissed?  Will game playing continue? (Oh yes it will.)   I have not changed my thoughts on it.  See the blogpost before this one.  I had a guy I don’t know call me stupid online yesterday because I supported Dr. King and I felt Judge Kavanaugh had a drinking issue as a teenager.

* Today is the one year anniversary of the massacre in Las Vegas during the country music concert.   I bring it up only because I think we can’t forget, and we can’t just talk about mass shootings when they happen and then forget when they don’t.   My heart goes out to the survivors and to the families of those who didn’t.    I pledged awhile ago to continue to work for better gun laws, tighten requirements for gun ownership, have longer background checks, and more.   I will NOT give up on the possibility that the American psyche about gun ownership CAN change.

* I feel today for some friends who had to put their dog down last week and are so sad and dealing with an ‘empty house’ right now.  I think about the quote I read some time back about God making turtles live for over a hundred years but dogs only 10 to 15 years.   It just doesn’t make sense.   But, I guess God knows that days are precious and each one is valuable.

* The upcoming wedding:   I will write more after the big day.   Right now I am doing the smaller details as we move closer day by day.   But, I have noticed some addresses were old ones and I feel bad for the people who did not get invited in a timely manner.  It was not meant as an exclusion.   In this age of computer and online communication, we don’t keep current with mailing addresses as we should.   I’m sending out some last minute emails…   sorry.

* I just read this post back.  Is it too negative???  Yikes!  Monday mornings should be more uplifting!  Really!   I’m ready for the week ahead.  I look forward to my quilting group at church this afternoon.  I’m excited to be seeing my grand sons this week!!!  And, I have music rehearsals this week.

Here’s a positive note to end on…

As I sad earlier, last week our community had great fear of devastating floods coming at us.  We were in a waiting game that was tense.  But, so many people – locally, and beyond our area – came and cared.  We had the National Guard here. We had police from other towns and other states.  The American Red Cross set up shelters.   Neighbors watched out for other neighbors.   Young people filled sand bags.   Lots of people donated food to first responders and others.       We ended up dodging the big bullet.  Yes, we had some flooding – but not nearly as distructive as it could have been.   Many prayed.  In fact, I even got a letter from the pastor of the church my daughter attends.  He wrote that we were included in their worship prayers – 45 people there praying for us.  Who knows how many more did…    thousands I’d guess.  Prayer heard?    Perhaps.   Thanks be to God for all the good that did come from it all.

Have a wonderful week ahead….

All for now.

I’m sure you have seen plenty about the Kavanaugh judicial committee hearings and the testimonies by Dr. Ford and by Judge Kavanaugh.   I watched all the live coverage (as I did the Anita Hill – Judge Thomas hearings) and I heard lots of commentary on it  after it was over.   I have seen memes on Facebook and I have talked with people about who’s testimony to believe, and who handled themselves the best in front of the committee.

So, you don’t ‘need’ to hear from me.    But, it’s my blog.  It’s a place for my opinion.

Here goes…

I found myself glued to the televised hearings!  It was fascinating TV!  And, it was a look at some of our elected officials at work in a way we don’t usually get.   Here is my take-away on it:

* I was actually impressed with how well most of the members of the committee spoke.  I know they have been at it for awhile and many of them on this committee were once attorneys.  It showed.  They have good knowledge about the procedures and our judicial system.

* I felt the emotion from them all!  Dr. Ford and Judge Kavanaugh of course spoke with passion about what happened/didn’t happen.   The Congressmen and women also did.   Good questions were asked.    I lean ‘blue’ in my social beliefs and therefore I know I felt proud of the Democrats on the committee and how they handled themselves.   My perspective favors the left.  But…

* I tried my best to put aside the political game playing.   It’s hard to take anything said by Congressmen and women without wondering if it’s all for the cameras, or for egos, or for the party politics. And just once I wish the sentence said by the media that “he is up for reelection” was not a consideration.    Seriously!  Can our congress perform their jobs without thinking about being re-elected?

* Dr. Ford was very believable.   She spoke from her heart, and she said several times she was trying to help as much as possible.   She knew what happened to her and she knew WHO was the abuser – 100 percent sure.     After hearing her testimony I believed her.

* Judge Kavanaugh was definitely emotional and at times during his opening statement I felt his pain. I almost wanted to turn away and not watch – because it was really hard to watch.   He was coming apart in front of us all.   Mad at times.  Hurt.  Sad.

But –  then the questions for Judge Kavanaugh started and that is when I think I saw the real him, and the truth started to come out.   The lifestyle he lived during his high school years, and especially the summer in question.  Country club life, beach weekends, sports events.  I could picture it.  I could picture all the guys getting together, hanging out and drinking beer.  A lot of beer.  I have known people who ‘change’ when they drink and even some that have blackouts.   I’m reminded of the Luke Bryan song “All My Friends Say.”  It’s about a guy who drinks hard, and wakes up the next morning – not knowing where he is, what happened to his money, etc.   All his friends say “I went a little crazy..”.   I think Judge Kavanaugh fit that description.  The judge became very nervous and edgy when asked about his beer drinking – and he immediately turned it around and asked back “don’t you like beer?”   That behavior is textbook for someone who knows they have a problem with alcohol.  Maybe they are not yet willing to openly admit to it, maybe the drinking has not stopped them from achieving personal and professional accomplishments.  For a long time it can be hidden, or laughed off, or ‘excused’.     I have known these people.

After hearing Judge Kavanaugh react to the questions about drinking, and about some of the youthful shenanigans that he and his friends did, I have no doubt that he physically attacked Dr. Ford back then.   No doubt.   He just doesn’t know that he did.  He doesn’t remember.  And when he is his sober self he would not do it.   Ask anybody who deals with and helps alcohol abusers.   This is classic behavior.

Saying this I am not optimistic that the Judge will be removed from consideration for the Supreme Court position.  But, I wish he would be.   He is in denial about his early life, and he may have actually lied in doing it.   During his lengthy opening statement    At the hearing he blamed the Democrats.  He did not stay non-political.  He expressed anger.  He said things and acted in a way a federal judge should not.

I feel sorry for him.  I know he feels bad for what he has put his family and friends through.  There has been lots of pain all around, and people have had to take sides.  I also feel very bad for Dr. Ford for having to live all these years remembering the experience of total fear and humiliation.  I feel bad that she and her family now have gone through all this, out in public.

There isn’t a winner.  But, a HUGE lesson is here.  Yes.  Something can be learned from it.  What is it?    Actions at any age have consequences.   Coverups never stay covered up.   Truth will come out eventually.

I live in the Lowcountry of South Carolina.  It’s called the lowcountry because it is low land right by the ocean.  It’s practically at sea level.  It’s very sandy.    The area is know for it’s beautful beaches and the ocean, but it also has water in the way of 4 rivers that’s converge not far from here, into the Winyah Bay, which then leads out to the ocean.    The rivers come from the north (the Waccamaw and the Pee Dee) and the west (the Black and Sampit).  It makes it a wonderful place to boat and to fish.  Historically it was an excellent place to grow rice, and once upon a time this was the place that produced the largest quantity of rice in the whole world.   There are marshes and old, overgrown rice fields everywhere.   It is beautiful!

Last week hurricane Florence made landfall up the coastline in North Carolina and once it got there it really slowed down.  It basically crawled a long for awhile and it dumped rain and more rain as it traveled.   You have seen the sad pictures and videos of those in New Bern and in Wilmington and surrounding areas.  People have been displaced from their homes from the power of the hurricane. Wind and rain.   Lots and lots of rain.

All that rain has been making it’s way into the NC creeks, and then into the NC rivers… and now it is surging downstream towards us.  Much of the water is coming down the four rivers I mentioned above.  The DNR and the specialists who track all of this say it’s going to be bad around here very soon. Extremely bad.  Historic flooding – rivers rising like never before!  Areas not in flood zones will go underwater.  Land in the lowcountry will be submerged.

Schools have been cancelled indefinitely.  Already. See, much of this area is connected by bridges over the rivers and lowlands.  If and when they become impassable then people will be ‘stuck’ and won’t be able to get to work, or to school, or perhaps to stores.   Medical help might get limited.

There are a lot of questions right now as many are preparing.  How deep will the waters get?   How far will the rivers spread?   How long will it take to recede once crested?

Our schools are already set up for shelters and as staging areas for rescue and recovery equipment.   Sandbags are available in several locations.

In the coming days the waters will raise by the hour.   Until Thursday, or maybe Friday.

For now we wait and watch and prepare.  We pray.   We keep calm.

 

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

Marla’s Musings is back.  it’s back at a different place so it might take me a little while to get up to speed.  Bear with me.

I took the advice of friends and created a blog site on WordPress.  I know I still need to personalize it and that will come in the next few weeks.  I have to play around a little and find pictures and icons and such that suit me.

So, I have not posted since July.  What has changed since then? What news is there?   Well, in a way nothing has changed.  But, yet, time has gone by and of course some things have certainly happened.

I will get into more in the coming weeks…    but to tease you…

there is a wedding on the horizon.  In fact it is scheduled ONE MONTH  from today!

My life as Mimi has been just the best!   My twin grandsons will be turning one next month.  So much to celebrate in October!

A hurricane came close by.  Florence skimmed by and scared us.  Hurricane season is not over yet.

Political issues have not quieted down.  You KNOW I have lots to say about all of that!  Ha

I started writing my blog quite a few years ago as a way to speak my mind and to tell  my daughters a little more about me, more than only being mom.  I think I have done that, and maybe one day I will figure out how to pull those old posts up and transfer them.  But, for now, you can find them at blogspot.com.   Marla’s Musings.

See you here again soon!